You left me (Part 2)

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He followed me home, slept with me in my bed like we always did.

"Julia! Are you up?" I groan feeling Brians hands wrap tighter around me

"I didn't know Danny was here" Brian groans into my hair

"He's been helping me" Brian stiffens and removes his hands from me

"You're still going to go?" I nod my head reluctantly

"I have to" I tell him "My mums not doing so well Brian, she doesn't have very long and I want to be with her"

"Why didn't you just say so?" He asks pushing my hair aside from my face

"You not being here was easier for me, leaving here without you wasn't so hard" I say slowly getting out of bed "I'm up Danny" I yell "I don't want you waiting for me, I don't think I can recover from the loss of my  mother, she had my younger siblings near her but now they are a mess so I have to go home and hold it down"

"Baby don't do this, let me help you" He tries to pull me back to him but I push him back until his arms are at his side

"Brian, please" I start to say "I'm finally ok with knowing why you left now"

I have to turn my back now or else I will turn around and fall back into his arms.

"Baby" his voice struggling with emotion "Ok" He gets up dressing and walks out the door. I hear him say hello to Danny and talk with him for a bit but I'm a mess at the foot of my bed.

I wailing into the pillows that lay on the floor trying to hide how my heart shatters.

Lying on the floor is where Danny finds me "You're a stupid girl you know that" I nod my head

"Mums waiting"

...
...
...

"You're a stupid girl" She says when I walk through to her bedroom. No hello how are you my sweet girl? Just you're a stupid girl.

Obviously Danny told her what happened. I send him a glare which he returns with a raised eyebrow.

"Brian is a good man and you throw it all away because he left you for his job, CIA is top stuff, he can't call you some days and you just have to pray that he will come back alive, I did the same with your father everyday before it happened"

My father was a soldier and died when I was 20, the youngest was 13. That was 10 years ago, now my mum is dying from cancer.

She knows she doesn't have long. She looks more and more tired but she still tries to talk as if she is fit and healthy.

"Mum please"

"No you need to know he is never going to be like Jamie, you were young and thought that was love, you're 30 now and you were with a man who worshipped the ground you walked on" I sigh. She starts coughing making me jump to her aid handing her a tissue and water.

"And you just throw that all away, I love you but you are stupid"

I stayed with my mum the entire time she was unwell. As soon as I was home though, it was suddenly time for her to go.

What I didn't know was that Brian was here upon her request.

As soon as I saw him, I released the floodgate of tears. I haven't seen him since I left 3 weeks ago and he has been here out of sight for the last week.

He was watching me from a distance that I knew he was so good at doing.

Danny told me he was here but I was too wrapped up in spending as much time as I could with my mother.

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