Thoughts.. I guess?

My mind.

A place, to waste away.
Trying to keep my feelings at bay.
Sometimes it's hard and I fall apart.
But I keep going, like pushing a cart.
In it resides memories of death and of hurt.
But sometimes I get this wild spurt.
I can be happy, but not without a consequence.
I try to have confidence.
And carry on, with a fake smile I will keep going.