Eddsworld Drabbles n Oneshots

Careful What You Wish For

((Do you ever wonder what happened with the neighbours in "The End" ?))

"Don't you 'ave anything better to do?" Eduardo asked, not even bothering to take his eyes off the TV to look over at Jon.
Jon, being the dim-witted being he was, responded with a true statement.
"No, actually,"
Eduardo groaned and rolled his eyes. The idiot didn't even know that it was a rhetorical question, and we all know that rhetorical questions are code for 'leave me the fuck alone'.
"I just thought it would be a good idea if we got out of the house today," Jon continued, walking infront of the TV.
"You're not transparent, asshole," the other man grumbled, hoping that Jon would take the hint and move out of the way.
"But 'Duardy, you've been staring at the television for hours now! Did you even sleep!?" Jon exclaimed. He was starting to get a little bit worried.
Ever since the super power incident Eduardo had been acting strange.
He would drink more caffiene than he really needed to, stay up for hours on end (most likely because of how much coffee he was drinking), and he was a lot more irritable than usual.
"Move. Your. Ass." Eduardo spoke in a firm tone.
Jon nodded a bit and moved from in front of the TV. When Eduardo used that tone he knew that the man was very close to hitting him, and if they were going out soon, he didn't want to go out with a black eye.
"I just thought it would be nice for us to hang out, you know?" Jon said, looking out the window. He saw that the neighbour's red car wasn't parked where it usually was.
"Look! Edd and his friends went out today, why c-"
"DON'T compare me to Edd," Eduardo cut Jon off, making him jump a little.
"Okay, s-sorry..."
He and Edd had made amends, but that didn't mean that the latino was less salty about it. He was pretty much the same, but just a bit nicer to Edd.
"Geez, Jon. Did it ever occur to you that I'm not Edd?!" The brunette asked roughly, finally looking up at Jon.
"I'm sorry! I-I didn't mean to I-I," the pale man felt panic rise up inside of him as Eduardo stood up.
"Sorry?! If you were really sorry you wouldn't have said anything!! You would leave me me be!!" His voice grew in volume, and when Jon looked into his eyes, he saw something he never saw before.
His deep brown eyes now had an unusual green glow behind them.
Jon whimpered as the taller man took a firm hold on his blue button up shirt, and tossed him against the wall.
"Just for once, could you stop being such a FUCKING IDIOT!!"
Jon pressed himself against the wall in an attempt to distance himself from Eduardo, and only then did the other man pause, the angered look on his face faltering.
Jon looked like he was about to cry, and Eduardo really didn't want any of that noise at the moment, so he huffed and backed off, mumbling to himself bitterly.
Suddenly, Mark walked into the room. He had heard the arguing, and decided to check up on them.
"What the fuck are you two doing?" The blonde asked.
Eduardo just ignored the question, and Jon was too busy trying to keep his composure.
This was a mess. This was a fucking mess, literally and figuratively.
Dirty mugs upon dirty mugs surrounded the couch. Eduardo hadn't even bothered to wash them when he was done with them.
Coffee stained the white shag carpet, and the room smelt awful, like stale coffee and wet dog.
Mark sighed deeply.
"For fuck sakes Eduardo!!! Could you not go five seconds without yelling at Jon?!?! Leave the poor bastard alone!!!" The brit scolded. "And clean up your mess!! How could you live in filth like this?!?"
Eduardo just huffed and marched out of the room, purposely bumping into Mark as he left.
Mark looked down at Jon, who's face was red and stained with tears. He frowned and sat Jon down on the couch.
"What happened?" He asked Jon.
"I-I compared...I compared Eduardo to Edd and he..he yelled at me.." Jon cried. He really couldn't take being yelled at, no matter what it was about. He literally could have murdered someone and if anyone yelled at him he would ask them not to.
"Shhh...it's okay," Mark hushed him, wrapping his arms around shorter man.
Jon decided to go to his room for a bit until Eduardo calmed down. So much for going out today.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Eduardo stood in the washroom, looking at himself in the mirror.
His body was falling apart, and he knew it was most likely a side effect of the radiation.
He had just bitten off most of his fingernails nervously, and now the sink and counter were sprinkled with tiny droplets of blood.
He felt so weak, and his mind felt fuzzy. He needed coffee, pronto.
Eduardo knew that the mighty need to drink coffee was probably a side effect of the radiation as well, but he didn't care. It was the only thing that made his mind clearer, and that's all he wanted right now.
The brunette cleaned up the bathroom and went to go make himself a cup.
Once he made it, he went into the living room, sipping his black coffee, enjoying the way it burned as it went down his throat.
Jon and Mark were both sitting on the couch. Jon was watching TV, and Mark was next to him, reading a book.
Mark looked up at Eduardo, then back at his book, rolling his eyes.
"I saw that, asshole," Eduardo mumbled.
"I wanted you to see it," Mark said.
All of a sudden, a sofa came crashing through the wall of their home.
All of them stayed silent for a while, not knowing what to say or do, until Mark just exclaimed, "Hey! Free sofa!"
Eduardo went to the front door and opened it to see what was going on. Jon followed not to far behind.
Tom walked down the street, his fists clenched and teeth gritted in anger.
Most people wouldn't say anything to get him even more pissed off, but Eduardo wasn't like most people.
He snickered, a shit eating grin spreading from ear to ear.
"HA! He looks happy!" He said sarcastically.
Jon raised an eyebrow, watching Tom as he walked off.
"Really? I don't think he looks happy at all! In fact, I think he looked sort of angr-"
"I wish you were DEAD." Eduardo stated grimly, glaring daggers at Jon.
The brit pouted, crossing his arms and walking back inside.
"You better be careful what you wish for, Eduardo," Mark said from behind him.
"Yeah, yeah, whateva,"
And with that, he closed the door.
((Wow I actually proofread this one))