Love, Honey

#3 *SS - Blades

Cold, sharp, deadly. Yet good. They help Jamie get through the toughest of times. Her mind gets clearer with every cut she makes, the harsh emotional pain gets replaced by bearable physical pain. She loves the short sting, the blood spillage, cold metal against warm skin. It makes her feel at ease.

Jamie doesn't care what kind of blade she uses. Anything will do, razor blades, knives, shards, anything. It's an unhealthy addiction of hers, she knows it, but it feels so right to her. How often did she try to stop? She can't remember.

Jamie tried too much, resulting in a new scar painting on her thigh every time. Resulting in her getting high by the intoxicating smell of fresh blood. The rusty, metallic smell and taste puts her at ease. The liquid racing down her leg gains all her attention. Jamie let's it be, not caring about the small puddle on the floor or the stain on her towel. It gives her something to play with. It seems odd to any other person, but she loves it.

Words are carved into her body, little art masterpieces, expressing her feelings to anyone looking closely. Jamie is an artist, her body is the canvas. If there's no space left, she'll just create something new out of something old, add something to deliver an entirely different message. 

The sad thing is that nobody understands the messages. The only thing Jamie has ever heard about her art is that she should stop, that it makes her ugly. Yet Jamie continues because she feels like she can't get any uglier, she can't destroy herself any more than she is already. She simply gave up even though she shouldn't have. But it's too late now. The blades are her friends and she cannot deny anyone friendship. She only has four or five people she can trust and talk to. But they are not always available, sometimes Jamie is on her own. Alone with her blades, the misery, the void. And she enjoys it. Every single cut.

A/N
Hello everybody!
I hope you enjoy "Blades" but please don't take any action I described and try it out yourself, because the addiction of cutting is not good for your body and since you don't really feel it anyway, why do it? I've been a long time cutter, 5 months clean now, and I'm slowly realizing that cutting is the stupidest thing I've done in a long time. It's time to stop for good, and I want to fill the void inside with something more efficient. And so should you!
I love you all and if you were waiting for I sign to stop, by all means, this is it!
Take care of yourself.
Love, Honey