The Blood Of A God || Loki Laufeyson

LIV - Numb

I actually cried a lot here

Mostly because I was watching OITNB and a certain death got me really inspired for it so I was emotion before, during, and after writing this *insert sob here*

It's short but beautiful

Also I listened to this song most of the time while I wrote this

So I'm just gonna cry while watching Gossip Girl

k bye

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Chapter Fifty-Four

Seline didn't remember much of what happened after Jacob died. The only thing she could really recall was that she stopped crying. It felt like her heart had stopped beating for awhile, as if it knew that she should not feel anything in those moments.

Jordan didn't feel sadness, only anger. He was frustrated and took it out on Annaque, ordering her to bring Jacob back. But Annaque couldn't do that. She couldn't do anything once Jacob was dead. When he came to terms with that, he took one last look at Jacob, and left before anyone else could stop him.

Tony assured her that he would take care of the body. Jacob would be given the best funeral that money could buy. She could only get out the words to say thank you, then left before Loki or anyone else could tell her to stay.

Seline waited for him in Jordan room, knowing that he would come back later that night. He didn't have anywhere else to go.

When he finally did, he looked at the liquor bottle that was in his hand, and then back at her before he burst into tears. She didn't shed a single tear, not even at the sight of her best friend crying. She needed to stay strong for him. He needed to hold onto something, and at that point, Seline was the only solid thing that he knew could never leave.

She held him tightly, not letting go until he cried himself to sleep. He had had his head in her lap, and when he fell to sleep on the bed, she got up slowly and set him down gently. She covered him up, and took the liquor bottle he had been holding. She threw it into the trash, then went to her own room.

She went to her own room with a whiskey bottle and glass in hand. She could hear the others talking on the floors above her, each of them not sure what to do from that point on. They were questioning if she and Jordan would stay, or if they would run. They didn't know where they should bury Jacob. They didn't know when to tell Fury. She blocked them all out, a ringing sound forming in her ears when she did.

The flames in her fireplace blazed, and she sat down on the couch by it. She poured a glass and drank, the liquid stinging as it went down her throat. She welcomed the pain with open arms. Glass after glass, one stinging sensation after another, she drained the entire bottle.

When she was on her last glass, she entertained the idea of going to get another, but that would involve leaving the safety of her own room. It was scary out of her room.

It was frightening because every single person in the building could die so easily. A knife to the neck or heart, even an artery. A poisoned piece of food or drink. A bullet to the head. An infected wound. They could be there one moment and simply vanish the next. Even Jordan had that luxury. She did not.

She had not been created like a normal vampire. She was chosen by whatever gods were watching over her. She was forced into the life that she didn't ask for. And because of that, she wasn't given a choice to give it up. She could not die. Even Malachai would have had a tough time actually killing her for good.

She was old. She had been around for hundreds of years. She had seen so many people age and die, while she stayed young and strong. So many that she had cared about had faded away.

That thought made her down the rest of the glass in the hopes that it would numb her pain. But it never did.. She had tried thousands of times to drown her sorrows in liquor. She was simply trying again and hoping for a different result that would never come.

She almost didn't hear him come into the room. But Loki shut the door and walked over to her, his shoes making the hardwood floor creak.

He sat down by her, not sure what to say. Then he took the glass from her hand, and set it down on the coffee table in front of the couch. He replaced her empty hand with his own, holding it tightly.

His cold skin against hers provided some level of comfort, but it also terrified her. Would there come a day when she would not feel that again? Would he leave, or worse, die?

She finally turned her head to look at him, her eyes filling with the unshed tears that had been there the entire night.

"Seline..." he whispered, then let go of her hand and pulled her to him.

She reacted the same way that Jordan had after his wife died and Seline found him. She didn't hug him back, her hands held up and away from him. She was afraid of breaking him, shattering him like she had everything else in her life. She didn't want to hurt him, but loving her was a death sentence. And him holding her now proved that he did. He did love her.

She broke down completely. He kept a hand on the back of her head, his fingers stroking her hair in a comforting manner. It didn't comfort her at all.

He didn't say anything else, and he didn't need to. She just needed him to hold her. And he did.

She finally did hold him back, her fingers digging into his skin and clutching at his shirt.

She felt like she couldn't breathe. Her heart was aching and her lungs were burning. Her friend was dead, and she couldn't do anything about it. What if the same happened to Loki?

"You will find peace". That was what she told Jacob. What if she never did?

The thought left as quickly as it came as she held Loki even tighter, the sobs that had racked through her body finally dulling.

As long as he was with her, she would get better.

She wasn't okay now... But as long as she had him, she would be soon.