Complicated Like That

Confused

Damn babe, look what you've done to me.

I used to think before I met you, that I knew what love was, but clearly I was wrong. I didn't. I was afraid of love, I still am.

You made me look at things from an entirely different perspective. I didn't know what I wanted until I finally figured that all I wanted, was you. You saved me. You were my cure, all the love I've ever felt pumped from my heart traveling through my body, igniting me with such a burning passion, every single fiber touched with this strong feeling. Making my heart beat so hard it hurts. I can't scream, I can't breathe. You slowly taking complete control over me. But I also felt everything, every vein, every bone, every nerve, all awake and buzzing in my body as if I'm charged with electricity. Pure adrenaline.

But you changed.

You became this egotistical, mean, heartless monster. And for what? Nothing. I never figured out why you changed. Why you completely shut off. And worst part is, you made it look so easy. It's like you just decided that one day you woke up and completely forgot about my existence. I was driving myself crazy and you were just perfectly fine.

You didn't even tell me what I did wrong.

So I continue to sit on my bed, bundled in a duvet and a pair of pillows, messy hair. Scattered thoughts full of words I cannot decipher and a heart wrenching lump in my throat crying over a boy who doesn't give a damn about me.

I hope you know that I still think about you most days and most nights. And if you would ever want to come back. I wouldn't hesitate, I would take you back. Just like that.

They tell me you're bad for me and that I should get over you but how can I do that when I love you so much and you mean everything to me. It's easy for them to tell me to forget about you but the feelings and memories you've given me isn't easy to get rid off.

It's getting colder and so is my heart. it's getting darker and so are my thoughts. The leaves are falling and so am I, falling apart.