Explosion (Kellic)

Sound

I actually considered skipping music class so that nothing would have to be awkward, but I really needed to talk to Josh. I walked in with three minutes to spare on the bell and immediately dumped my stuff next to Mike in my usual seat. He gave me a small smile that I ignored. I turned towards the door and folded my arms, an angry expression on my face. I didn't even notice that barely anyone was in the classroom.

Jaime came over and poked me, "What's got your panties in a twist?" he asked.

"Vic," Mike answered for me. But he was wrong.

I turned to him, gave him a confused look them shook my head, like, What are you talking about?

Mike looked a little surprised. He opened his mouth to ask me something but I cut him off, holding up a finger to tell him 'One moment.' I started towards the door to wait for Josh. The door opened and Vic walked through, Josh coming in right behind him just as the bell rang. My hands clenched into fists at my sides as I intercepted him.

Josh blinked, looked scared for a moment, but then regained his composure. "Kellin," he said calmly. "This is not up for discussion."

A wave of anger washed over me and I could swear that I was seeing red. I wanted to sign a whole friggin book to him, but I didn't even know if he knew sign language. Besides, I didn't really know what to say, so I just signed, 'I can't do it.'

Josh looked at my hands, "Why not?" he asked. I was surprised that he understood, and also pretty happy that I could communicate with him using something I was comfortable with.

'Because I can't fucking talk to people, what makes you think that I can sing?'

"Oh Kellin I know you can sing. I've heard it. All thanks to your boy Justin."

'I never wanted him to send those in. I don't want to be in a band. I want to be a-'

"Mechanical engineer, I know," Josh interrupted. "Justin told me. But you can't be a mechanical-"

'How much has Justin told you about me then?' I was a little scared about the answer and I actually took a step back from him, ready to run if need be. I couldn't have anyone knowing about my parents and what they did. They'd kill me. Literally.

Josh shrugged, "He told me enough to let me know that you're fucking talented and need to pursue the right career."

'Do I even get a say?'

"Like I said, this isn't up for discussion." He turned to the rest of the class, which consisted of Vic, Jaime, and Mike. I was too angry to wonder where everyone was, but Josh explained right away, "Alright, this is all we've got today. The rest of this class are seniors and if I'm not mistaken it's senior skip day so I guess you three-" Josh stopped, looked around, "Where's Mr. Perry? He's not a senior is he?"

"He went home sick," Mike said. He shot a glare at Jaime, "It's probably your fault, too." Jaime and Vic laughed.

"Well alright," Josh said. "You guys can continue with your projects then. Are you ready for the sound room?"

"Yeah," Jaime answered. "But Tony isn't here so we have no piano player."

"Kellin can do it," Vic said immediately. I blinked, took a step back, shaking my head. Vic stood, "C'mon man, I've heard you play. You don't have to perform in public or anything, it's just us." He shrugged, like it was no big deal.

Oh boy if only he knew.

Still, though, I followed them over to the sound room. Mike produced some music for me to read off of and I stepped up to the keyboard set up in there.

Josh stood in the doorway, "Do you guys need anything? Kellin do you want a chair maybe?"

I held up the paper they expected me to play, feeling a little intimidated. I guessed that Tony was pretty damn good at piano if this is what he did on a regular basis. The notes took up basically the whole keyboard, with the key changing four times. I'd need to be able to move around. I just waved a hand behind me as a no, trying my best to remember some of the notes so I could play it easier.

"We're doing a remixed version of Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls," Jaime explained. I could see that, though. As well as reading music, I could also read words. "The beginning is basically the same; it starts off slow. Vic said that you were playing this when he found you in the music room yesterday."

I didn't make any indication that I'd heard him. I was feeling totally terrified.

"Kellin . . . are you-" 

I cut Josh off, signing, 'I'm fine,' quickly, only half turning back to him. I didn't even look him in the eye, just stared at the floor.

There was silence behind me and I could swear that they were sharing looks. "Alright," Josh said and I heard the door close quietly. I returned my focus to the music, leafing through it a few times.

"It gets a little fast pretty quickly," Vic said. "So uhh . . . just play what you can I guess." It kinda annoyed me how chill and normal he was being. Almost like he didn't hate me for not talking. I rolled my eyes, something he didn't see and still made no movement.

"You start," Mike said. "I'll count you in." There was a click, then his voice kinda echoed a bit. It occurred to me that he was talking to Josh on the other side of the glass. "Ready?"

Josh's voice filled the room, "When you are."

"Alright," Mike said. "One . . . two . . . three . . ."

I started playing softly, as the music said. There were words on the page after the introduction was over. I took it as Tony's time to sing. I felt obligated to sing, too, but didn't. I just hummed instead. After about halfway through the verse, things started to get super complicated. I guess Tony's voice was supposed to cut off in static as the piano keys did some sort of dun dun dun thing and-yup Jaime hit a chord on his electric guitar and Mike went crazy on the drums. Vic started screaming-something I hadn't been expecting at all. I spun, looked at him with wide eyes and I swear I giggled like a schoolgirl.

I just watched them rock out for a moment, feeling right at home with all the noise surrounding me. How could I have ever wasted an opportunity to be with these guys? They were just like me. I laughed outright, just feeling so happy all of a sudden, then turned back to the keyboard. I turned up the volume like the paper said I should, then jumped right back in, not even worrying about how fast it was or if I was going to mess up. I felt truly happy for the first time in months. This was my stuff. It was like my guys were back here with me.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to play next Friday.