Summertime (Frerard)

5: Everything About Him Confuses Me

"Frank..." Light flooded into my eye sockets almost blinding me as I came to the somewhat disappointing conclusion that I was in fact, not dead. "Frank are you okay?" I focused on my surroundings,  but I couldn't quite make anything out other than blurry shapes. "Frank, talk to me!" The voice was impatient and even sounded worried. I knew no one who'd ever care that much - except my mother of course. Maybe I was dead after all, maybe I was in heaven right now? Nah, I wouldn't make heaven;  I just like to think that I would.

The brutal truth of that thought seemed to pull me entirely back into consciousness and I couldn't do anything but stare as I recognised the face of the figure. Concerned hazel eyes staring into mine and unkempt red hair - Gerard Way.

To say I was confused would be an understatement.

"Gerard..." The word fell out of my gaping mouth and bounced beside his feet. I didn't know what to say, how to react; nothing made any sense at all.

"Frank!" he grabbed my arm, almost hugging me and I was beginning to suspect that I was in fact dreaming, the whole mad situation being concocted lovingly by non other than my own madhouse of a head. "You're alright." He was so close to me, the words were whispered into my arm and it seemed my skin absorbed them before my ears.

I shuffled back from him in panic, "what the fuck is going on?" My tone was a little on the harsh side, but I was panicked as hell, so I guess that cut me some slack.

"You... you passed out Frank," Gerard's voice trembled as if he was panicking, himself, "I t-thought you were dead." He looked scared. This was Gerard Way; could he even do scared? More importantly, was this all an act, a prank, some sort of sick joke? I wouldn't put it past him. And people like that, people like Gerard Way, were the kind of people I most certainly did not want to be associated with.

After a few moments of silence, I let put what was quite possibly the most pathetic response, "I thought I was dead too."

"You seem worryingly calm about that." Gerard observed and I just nodded, opening a conversation of the nature, with him of all people was the least of my concerns.

Suddenly my brain made some sort of connection,  "Gerard was it you that attacked me?" It was an honest question and considering my previous meetings with him, it seemed quite a reasonable question, from my perspective at least. He didn't see it that way.

"What the fuck, Frank?" He screamed at me. "I look after you to make sure you're alright and this is all you can say."

I took a moment to finally notice my surroundings: we were in the woods. 'Did you take me here?" I looked up into those sad hazel eyes.

He nodded, "you needed to be some place safe." It took me a while to process this information.  It was so much easier when he was just an asshole, but no; Gerard Way is confusing as hell. "I carried you all the way." My eyes widened, imagining Gerard carrying my unconscious body across town just because he wanted me to be safe.

I repeat, Gerard Way is confusing as hell.

"What happened before I passed out then and how did you happen to be so easily on hand?" It would be so much easier if he had been lying and he just felt guilty for punching me unconscious.

He bit his lip, his eyes making a beeline to the floor, "my brother," he almost sounded ashamed, "and his friends." He slowly peeled his gaze up as if I was going to be angry at him, I was past that... for now.

"Mikey's an asshole. " Gerard smirked and nodded. "You still haven't told me why you were with them."

"I was meant to uhh... be giving Mikey a ride home and when he didn't meet me I went to look for him and found you." I nodded disbelievingly, not even moderately satisfied with his explanation.

"Tell the truth." His cheeks flushed a deep red, "you were with them weren't you?"

He shook his head, "Mikey and his friends weren't even there."

My eyes widened, "it was just you? And to thing I was actually beginning to like you-"

"No!" Gerard exclaimed, "wait, what do you mean 'like' me?"

I rolled my eyes, "what do you mean 'no'?"

He sighed, "I was woth some frienda, some really bad friends, they're barely even my friends, I'm just sort of stuck with them. I'm too scared to say anything; they're horrible people and they- we decide to do horrible things." He swallowed hard.

I raised my eyebrows, "so basically,  you're in a gang?"

He snorted, "I wouldn't exactly put it like that, but if it makes you happy-"

"Not exactly." I gave him an almost motherly, stern, disappointing look, but he had those sad eyes and goddamn it! "Ypu have to get out of that scene, okay?" He nodded frantically.

"I know, I know," he drew in a sharp gasp of air, "I just wish I could, Frank. I really wish I could."

I paused for a moment, "it's okay, Gerard. If you hate what they're doing, I guess maybe I could forgive you."

He sighed, eyes plummeting to the floor once again. "Frank. Sometimes I enjoy it though. Sometimes I laugh and relish the moment. Frank-"

"When you beat up me, did you enjoy that?" My tone instantly turned sour.