LUNARIS

Chapter 9

Kieran left the room too soon, not before repeating the same words I told him. Even though that moment was like feeling a piece of heaven, later on, I felt worse. Our love would never come true, we would never be together, unless there was a way of escaping the situation I was in. Laying down on my bed, I pondered about the whole Alastair thing, and about what just happened. I was happy and sad, mostly sad, but I wouldn't allow myself to give up. I had confessed my feelings for my best friend, and he did too. He was my salvation, he only person that would make me forget the ugly in the world, and I couldn't live without him. Can we run away? I asked myself. It sounded too cliché, but if I truly wanted to be with Kieran then I guessed that was the best option so far. WE are running away, I told myself as I smiled, but the smile suddenly faded as I heard the door opening.

          "Would you mind knocking before walking in?" I asked my mother kindly, she walked towards  me, she was smiling brightly, the brightest smile I've ever seen on her.

          "Clementine." She called out in an oddly satisfying, happy tone. She hugged me as I looked at the door that remained open. I was hoping the wind would do its job but it wasn't doing a thing. "I'm so happy you got chosen. I can't believe it!" She added, then stopped hugging me, but grabbed my hands. I looked up at her with a mournful stare. I was just smiling. 

          "Mum... I'm scared..." I admitted, looking up at her. She raised an eyebrow, her youthful face suddenly looked deformed.

          "Afraid? Of what?" She asked,

           "I-I don't want to marry just like this." I told her. She raised her other eyebrow, just when she was about to speak, I interrupted her. "My feelings for him... I mean, I have no feelings for Alastair. I can't feel them coming, it feels as if I was empty inside." I went on as I pulled away my hands from hers.

          "Clementine... Don't begin with this please. I need you to understand-"

          "Understand?" I echoed, and suddenly lost control, "What am I supposed to understand?! YOU and dad should understand this is not what I want for me!" I hissed, took a deep breath just to lower my tone towards my mother, "I KNOW what I want and what's good for me, and marrying Alastair is definitely something I don't desire." 

          My mum took a step back, and turned her hands into fists. "You should stop thinking about yourself in this situation then! Think about how you would help Dawnsbury with all the wealths of Westview! Think of it!" My mum said in a strict tone, she was having a hard time trying to remain calm. 

          "Once I become queen of Westview I will not belong to Dawnsbury anymore, mum! And Westview has zero, ZERO concern in Dawnsbury!" I snapped back. My heart beats quickened.

           "That's enough, I don't want to hear ANY of your complains anymore. You are going to marry king Alastair LIKE IT OR NOT!"

           "IF YOU CARE THAT MUCH ABOUT DAWNSBURY WHY DON'T YOU MARRY ALASTAIR YOURSELF!?"

           "SILENCE!!!" My father roared. I didn't even notice him coming inside my temporary room. He walked closer towards me, and I began regretting what I had told my mum. Her eyes widened, showing fear, but no more fear than the one I was showing. My mother backed away slowly few steps as my father got closer to me. When he was about a meter close to me, he stopped, showing a face I feared a lot. He looked at my mum and looked back at me, now with a chilling look. "Get out." He said. At first I thought he was meaning me, so I stood up. "I said GET OUT." My father repeated, looking at my mum, who exited the room as if she was numb. Even though I didn't showed much fear physically, I was panicking inside, I didn't knew what to do. I didn't even care if my father saw me in my nightgown right now I was fearing for my life. "What did you just tell your mother?" He asked in a chilling tone. My widened eyes didn't dare to blink, I was to shocked to answer or make any move, but first of all, I was wondering if that was a question that was meant to be answered.

          "I-I-I never meant to tell her those things." I apologized. My father rose to me, lifted an arm and slapped me. I feel to the floor. I must have inherited my slapping abilities from my father... I thought quickly, but the thought flew away from my mind as I felt the impact of falling on the floor. I gave a quick stare to the ground then looked back at my father, who was breathing roughly, making an effort on calming down, suddenly a tear fell down his cheek. What are you doing? You were the one who implemented that odd rule... I thought, but my face remained in shock. 

           "Don't you know...? Don't you know how much it hurts me to treat you this way?!" He said, more tears fell down from his eyes. He was having a hard time trying to stop crying and hiding his tears. "What made you like this? WHO made you like this?" He asked in the saddest tone I've heard so far, it was even scary. I fell chills on my back. Seeing my father cry, a strong man, who made Dawnsbury army grow, conquered many lands and fought for the kingdom, was painful, more painful than the slap he just gave me. "Tell me, Clementine... What do you want?! I want you to be happy, but what am I supposed to do?!" He asked. His questions didn't make sense to me, but I knew that if I answered in Clementine style 'I don't want to marry Alastair' then something bad would happen. I remained silent. My dad rubbed his eyes, and within seconds he stopped crying and turned neutral and quiet. Is he waiting for me to answer? I asked myself. 

          "Dad..." I whispered. He looked down, he opened his mouth to say something, but remained silent and exited the room, closed the door gently. I tried my best to hold my tears back, and I succeeded in that, but my mind was in middle of a war. Made my way back on my bed, and remained there the whole day. I could hear my stomach roaring, begging for food, but I refused to go out of my room after he intense situation. Even after all of that, I couldn't get Kieran out of my mind. WE are running away together... I promised myself.