Funny Jokes

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Who Killed Abel?
I went to the police station to certify my document. On arrival, I met one of the policemen reading the bible, specifically Genesis, I was so impressed so I asked him, “Officer, who killed Abel, Adam’s son?” He raised his head, looked at my face with dismay and said, “I don’t know, ask Sgt Asare, he is in charge of murder cases.”

Mad Man and the Pilot
A pilot was transporting a bunch of madmen from Lagos to a psychiatric facility in Johannesburg, South Africa. The madmen were making noise and suddenly, one of them entered the Pilot’s Cabin;
MADMAN: Teach me how to fly a plane!
PILOT: I would, but under one condition.
MADMAN: What?
PILOT: If you can get your colleagues to keep quiet.
(5 minutes later, the plane was eerily quiet!)
PILOT: Wow! How did you get them to keep quiet?
MADMAN: I opened the door and asked them to go and play outside! 

 HOW 2 CROSS ROAD IN NAIJA.
Look right and left for cars and bikes, look up for aeroplane, down for bomb, back for kidnappers, look side, hold your bag tight and watch the person beside you. Then walk zig zag to avoid stray bullet.


The Trial
An Igbo man, a Yoruba man and an Hausa man were lost in a forest and then captured by cannibals. The king of the cannibals told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step was to go deep into the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of
fruits. The three men went their separate ways to gather fruits.
The Yoruba man came back and said to the king,”I brought 10 apples.”
Then the king explained the trial to him,”You have to swallow the fruits without any
expression on your face or you will be killed. The first apple went in, but on the second one,
he winced out in pain, so he was killed.
The Igbo man arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to
him, he thought to himself that this should be easy...1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8 and on the ninth berry, he burst out in laughter and was killed.
The Yoruba man and Igbo man met in heaven and the Yoruba man asked,”Why did you laugh? You almost got away with the trial.”
The Igbo man replied,”I couldn’t help it, when I saw the Hausa man coming with Watermelons!”

Which one is your favorite?

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