"this thing is fucking annoying." liam grumbles.
"what's up with you and your potty mouth lately?"
"i've always cussed."
"not this much."
"yeah well i hate this wheelchair. i don't even need it anyway! i can still walk you know."
it seems like harry and liam go over this every day. "barely. you get out of breath too easily. we can't have you passing out and hurting yourself."
"whatever." liam mumbles and crosses his arms.
"nope. we're not having none of that." harry bends down and uncrosses liam's arm. "stop pouting."
"i'm not pouting!"
"i'm not pouting!" harry mocks. "you do realize everything you're doing right now is contradicting yourself right?"
"oh shut up and get me out of this wheelchair!" harry chuckles and kisses liam's still pouted lips. he grabs liam just under his armpits and pulls him to his feet. liam stumbles a bit and grabs onto harry frantically.
"it's okay. i got you." harry picks up liam bridal style and carries liam upstairs. he kicks his bedroom door open and lays liam on the bed before climbing on top of him.
"we cuddle so much you know? like, it's all we do." liam says and intertwines their fingers.
"mhm."
"and why are you always laying on me? you're like twice my size!"
"i don't know." harry chuckles. "i like it though. it feels right."
"me too." liam says softly. they go into a comfortable silence. harry listens to liam's heartbeat as liam plays with his hair. "i wonder what heaven looks like." liam says after a moment. "is it like some golden kingdom up in the sky or is it just like earth but everything's perfect?" harry doesn't reply to this and liam sighs. "harry. we have to talk about this eventually."
"i don't want to." and he really doesn't. he's been avoiding this topic for about a year now. he doesn't want to talk or think about it because he knows if he does, he'll break down.
"i need to know what you're thinking babe. talk to me." harry shakes his head and focuses his gaze on the wall. "i know this is hard for you. it's hard for everyone. once i'm gone, my mom will have nobody! her parents are dead, she has no siblings, and she's already lost her husband. that's what i'm most afraid of. i won't be here to comfort her when she grieves. and your mom and sister are like a second family to me. i don't want to leave them. then we have eleanor and sophia. they are the only nurses who treat me as me, not some hospital patient. especially sophia. she's been like my older sister for years. and i'm terrified of leaving you. when i first met you who would've known that we would be dating? we're together almost every day and i don't know how it's going to be for you when that suddenly stops. that's my biggest fear. leaving the ones i love and not being able to do a thing about it."
"liam please stop." harry can feel the lump in his throat. the last time he's cried over this was when he first found out, and that was over a year ago. he doesn't want to stop that.
"i used to be afraid of death but now not so much. if it's my time, it's my time. it just sucks that i have to leave so early."
