Finally We're Done Playing Games

Chapter 7: I Can't Remember

"So what's on the schedule?"

I asked after the driver put my bags in the back and got in, driving Destiny, Tasha and I to our destination. We were stopping for one radio interview before I had to catch a flight to New York to officially start promoting my album again. I caught the beginning of what Destiny said, but I eventually tuned her out as I looked out the window.

"Y/N..."

The dragged out version of my name made turn back to them.

"Are you listening?"

I shook my head to myself before nodding.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry."

"Are you sure you want to go back into promoting the album? The fans will eventually understand. They can wait a little longer."

Destiny said making me shake my head again.

"No. I need to do this. Being in that house is making my head hurt. I need to get out or I'll go crazy."

They nodded, but didn't finish telling me the schedule. Figuring I wouldn't listen anyways. Which I wouldn't have since I got lost in my thoughts again for the rest of the trip.

We arrived at the first studio set after a half hour of mostly silence. I handed Tasha my phone as I sat in my interview chair, putting on the headphones so I could hear him but leaving one of my ears open just in case.

Although short, most of the interview was spent taking about my new release dates for my postponed album. At one point he tried to dig deeper into me and Dinah's sudden absence. I avoided the question though, both of us already having a plan with how we were going to release that information. Once the interview ended I repeated the process all over L.A. Then moved to Sacramento and San Francisco before hitting multiple stations in Illinois, Florida, Texas, and New York.

I was able to finish all of it in a week and a half before I headed back to California. Ever since the breakdown Dinah had in Malo's nursery, pretty much that entire day was the last time she mentioned Malo again. She acts as if the entire six months never happened. Even if the memory had nothing to do with the actual pregnancy she'll act as if she doesn't remember. I always brought it up to my friends but they all felt like I was looking too much into it and that everyone grieves differently.

After everything she hadn't walked back into the nursery, so I had to clean it by myself. But I could barely last five minutes without all the emotions coming back. So all the girls came over one day and helped me clean everything up. Even repainting. It was still emotional for us but with all seven of us there to lean on each other, it made it easier.

I figured since Dinah was acting oblivious to the pregnancy then she would get back into making music like I was. At one point I thought my assumptions were true because she had scheduled to go back in and record almost a month ago. But she missed every session, instead staying in the house and doing whatever. It was obvious her label was growing impatient with her because of the constant money wasted on missed studio time. I think they were being lenient with her because of what happened and because they had already prepared for her to miss the time anyways. I had been trying to talk to her about it, even if it was just about the music, but she completely shut every conversation down.

When I walked into the house, she had her music playing at a deafening tone. I shook my head, following the sound and seeing she was in the kitchen. I leaned on the island in the middle of the kitchen, smiling at her at how she was nodding her head and cooking as a top 40 song played and how she still had yet to notice me. The song changed to one of the unreleased songs I had recorded with another artist. Dinah had heard a snippet of it once and begged for it. I gave it to her after lots of begging since I wasn't supposed to let anyone hear it since the guy was technically still in jail when we recorded the song.