midnight // love poems

distance

You're so close to me that I can see the stitches in the bracelet that your best friend gave you three years ago.

I can see the nape of your neck turn to where I am and I avert my gaze faster than you left, which, trust me, is pretty goddamn fast.

And now I'm looking at my shoes.
Looking at the floor.
Looking at my friend.
Looking at the bag.
Looking at my phone.

My phone. There were few sounds that sounded as much as home as the sound of your notification, yes, I had a special notification for you I know I'm pathetic, your message pervades my phone. Now I can't tell what I haven't heard in longer; the notification of the sound of your voice saying my name.

I've heard your voice. We're close to each other, remember. Physically. There's nothing more heartbreaking than having miles and miles of metalled roads and deep blue seas and schorchujg deserts between us, separating us, when you're right next to me.

You're sitting next to me but I wish there were continents between us because that is distance that I can understand.

I don't want to walk by you and pretend I haven't seen you the way I pretend it doesn't bother me when I say hi to your best friend and not to you.

Distance is fucked up
But then so were we

Unending kilometres of streets swept with silence

Infinite oceans ridden with rising tides and riveting storms with lightening lighting up the sky that was darker than the night you told me you loved me

Forests of frozen faces; feelings fading and contact breaking- too many words, no words at all

This is a different kind of long distance. Not the kind where you love me. Not the kind where you left me. But the kind where you are the closest thing to me, and the farthest thing from me.

Suns burn things when they come to close and warm things that are far; either I'll get burnt this close of feel frigid too far. Suns give light too, so either I'll go blind in the light or die in the dark but either way there's all this space between us, galaxies, mountains, valleys and solar systems.

You're right fucking next to me and I've forgotten how to breathe but I think you've forgotten me. Or us. Whatever that was.

Distance is impassable tornadoes of everything we never were.