Are you bored out of your mind and in want of some low-quality "literature" to entertain your stress-consumed brain for a few moments?
If so, this is the book for you.
Are you looking for an actual book?
If so, this is most definitely not the boo...
Ahem! I'm trying to talk here! Please return to your designated abode in the dark recesses of my brain, my lovely Ice Queen. As much as I enjoy your sarcastic presence, I am trying to get a point across here.
Queen Saralee: I'd come up with a comeback for that which would result in an array of comments containing messages to the effect of "BURRRRRRN!" However, you requested that I withdraw my "sarcastic presence," and if I disobey you in the presence of our respected readers, I may scare some of them off with the world-shaking timing of my masterful roasts. I shall return to my place of residence, the luxury of which greatly exceeds that of yours.
See? Even her declaration that she will not roast anyone contains a subtle roast. But then again, what can I say? She's Queen Saralee, the Ice Queen of Lessaenes and Sarcasm (not the Ice Queen of the Plot Twists- that's me). Moving on, I apologize on the behalf of my inconsiderate Imperial counterpart. If you don't mind, do allow me to start over.
Now, there are two types of people in this world: planners and doers.
At first sight, it appears that I am indisputably a planner. I keep detailed to-do lists which I update as frequently as possible. The names of every event I will attend or participate in from today until the first week of June are written out on the decorative wall calendar that hangs on my refrigerator. Surprises make me more nervous than pleased, and I write schedules for myself to follow during breaks, in order to avoid feeling unproductive.
Yet, in some instances, I lean further to the doer side of the spectrum. Writing is the prime example of this.
Who hates outlines?
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I do!!!
That's saying quite a bit. It's rare that I even mildly dislike anything related to writing, let alone what some educators consider the "legs" of a piece of writing. (Because animals stand on their legs, and essays are supposed to 'stand' on their outlines? Get it? Yeah, neither do I.)
Outlines aren't legs at all. In fact, they're more like appendices. They're just pointless little afterthoughts, and sensible people really have no idea why they exist.
(I feel the need to point out the fact that autocorrect wanted me to use the incorrect plural "appendixes." I, an unexceptional high school student, know more about grammar than the tool that's tasked with fixing the grammatical errors of people across the world. Just think about that for a second. It's a little scary, in my opinion.)
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that outlines serve no purpose at all. In fact, they can be great for helping struggling writers organize their thoughts and produce a coherent piece of writing. I've also noticed that they're very helpful when writing magazine articles, dry, structured expository essays for school (the ones that require you to exactly follow a rubric that's usually longer than the actual essay) and other short pieces that are intended purely to inform.
