I Want You(Jason McCann)

Chapter 11

Can you guys make me super happy by clicking the star at the bottom of your screen!?

Also, the picture above is Jason as a teenager.

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Jason's POV

Life should be warm and welcoming. It should guide you in the right direction. Life should be and do these things but it doesn't. It throws you on Earth and expects you to find your own damn way. It is plain unfair and fucked up.

My life was nowhere near okay. It was terrible coming home to a fucked up father and a drugged up mother. Only family I had that actually cared for me was Alex. He did the best he could. My family should have never even been able to hold the name 'family'. My father was a complete fuck up. He spent his nights drinking, fucking different women, doing unnamable dugs, beating my mother, or not coming home for weeks. Sometimes months.

I was stuck at home with my drug-abusing mother. Alex was in the gang shit before me. He would always come home early in the morning or late at night. I would have to take care of my mother. I was never able to hang out with friends or go out like a normal kid. Working and catering is what I spent my afternoons doing.

My mom would be so drugged up somedays that she couldn't even remember her name. At first, I felt bad for her. My mother was completely helpless at times. I would watch her get hurt every day. Now I know she is a good for nothing mother and that is all she will ever be.

There were better times in the McCann household. My father never drank, went out, or hit my mother. My mother never laid a finger on a drug and she was the smartest most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I loved my family then.

I still didn't have many friends but my life was good. We were like a family from a magazine. That is until my father ruined everything and cheated on my mother. She would cry almost every night until one day her cries stopped and the cocaine began. My parents would argue every night until my dad stopped coming home at reasonable times.

Alex began the gang when my mom forgot how to purchase groceries and how to care for her children. She was too drugged to think straight. Sometimes I would watch as she messed up the simplest things. My mother could no longer prepare a peanut butter sandwich. My father would smack her or call her vile things when she messed up. She would apologize continuously but her apologies were worthless to my father.

My father hated when we would apologize for things but he hated when we didn't. My mother would be smacked. Alex would be punched in the stomach and I would be punched, kicked, stabbed, or I would not be able to eat for days.

After a while, I grew to realize that my father hated me and if he were still alive, he would have killed me. I got lucky that night when Alex came home earlier than usual. Alex stabbed and killed him that night. My mother was useless and we had to get out of there. Sometimes I feel terrible for blaming my mother for the crime but other times I'm thankful. Thankful Alex and I were never caught.

After that night I dropped out of high school and joined the gang with Alex. I was at the end of my junior year and I never went to class anyway. I didn't have friends but I had people to hang with or get high and drunk with. Most of the people I would hang with were hookups when I needed to get off. That was my only reason for being around them.

If I chose not to attend school at all, I would take my mom's car and drive around looking for the next all too willing prostitute. My first time was at twelve. By thirteen, I felt I was basically on my own. I had only Alex to depend on and he was only my sibling. There was only so much he could do.