I'm Sorry | Jackson Wang

7: Group Etiquette

Luna

It feels so terrible sitting next to him, knowing I left him like I did. But I didn't want to hurt him...
I know I failed there, all those years ago.
"Uh.. so. How is everyone today?" Kai asks from across the table.
I'm fine. I mean, I want to throw myself off of a cliff so Jackson can carry on with the rest of his life without having the worry about seeing me again, but yeah, I'm fine.
"Well, I mean, manager-hyung got us meat, so... that better than Jackson's gotten you, right Jinyoung?" Bambam laughs at his failed attempt at a joke, seeing it only filled a couple of seconds.
He looks down at his lap awkwardly.
"Hey, let's talk about something. Like.. how's training going for you guys?" JB asks, but I feel like it's more directed at his old girlfriend, Sulli.
And she responds. "Uh, it's good. We've made a lot of progress in the couple years we've been here.. excited for another stage."
He nods. "That's good."
"Mhm.."
An awkward silence lays itself across our table.
"Well," Jinyoung says, "how bout we get some food in out mouths, huh?"
Everyone besides Heemin, Jackson, Bora and I loudly agrees.

"Come on, Unnie, come dance with me.." Bora pleads, pulling on my sleeve trying to get me away from the bar.
"Bora-Bora, I'm not feeling it today.. just go have fun, I'll be okay here, sweetie." I give her a small smile that I hope is convincing.
She pouts, "Okay, but you have to take me dancing sometime to make it up to me."
I chuckle and nod.
We had all went out to a bar for further "bonding" purposes. The guys are all having fun, the girls are dacing around, being cute, and I'm sat at the bar, drink in hand, observing.
And by observing, I mean staring at Jackson jumping around with JB and Mark.
Seeing his smile is just about enough to make me fall for him again, just enough to make me melt.
Just enough to break my heart.
As I sip on my rum and coke, I think about all the nights where he must've cried himself to sleep thinking he wasn't good enough for me.
Or didn't cry at all because I meant nothing to him.
But judging by all the texts and calls I got after I left him, he cried.
And all because of me..
He probably doesn't know that halfway around the world, I was crying, too.
I take another big gulp of my drink, hoping e end up drunk by the end of the night.

Jackson

I honestly didn't think Luna of all people would be the one to get drunk and bring the night to a screeching halt.
"How long does it take to get a cab, for God's sake??" Heemin yells into the street.
"It's probably because there are so many people all together. Which way are you guys going?" Jaebum asks the girls.
"Southeast." Sulli says over the traffic, whilst looking up and down the road for an available cab.
"So are we. Come on, we'll walk you."
"Luna's in no position to walk, we'd have to drag her home."
Thinking it over, I bravely volunteer, "I could take her.." Mark and Jinyoung both give me looks that ask, "are you out of your mind?", and Sulli and Heemin look like deer in headlights.
"Just give me the address and a way to get in and I'll make sure she gets home safe, I promise."
"Yeah, okay." Tae gives me the address and her key, and slides Luna's limp frame over to me. Feeling her warmth for the first time in over 2 years is so nice, but I make a mental note to not get too caught up in old feelings.
"Just get her home and leave the door unlocked for us. One of us can drive you home when we get back," Tae explains.
I nod. "Alright."