Just Like You (UNDER RECONSTRUCTION)

Those Four Words

You never realize how much you need someone until they're gone.

Walking into school next day, I only had one word to describe how I felt. Empty.

Since we were in second grade, Cam had always been there to walk through the front doors with me. He hadn't showed up as usual every morning over the last week, and I rarely saw him at school.

The only time I saw him was at lunch, watching him sitting with my own friends while I sat with his old group, Ray being the only one that actually cared enough to acknowledge me.

I was in the bathroom washing my face a few minutes before the bell when I heard the door open behind me and caught Shay's eye as she walked passed me and toward the stalls.

"Hey." She mumbled, waving shyly as she slowed to a stop. I grabbed my purse from the counter beside me and started toward the door. Before I could grab the handle, Shay caught my wrist and stepped in front of me.

"What's going on with you, Blake?" She whispered, her eyes roaming my face for something I'm sure she wouldn't find.

"Nothing. I've gotta go, Shay." I tried to move again, but my best friend's grip tightened around my wrist, her blood red lips pursed.

"I gave you two weeks to figure out what the hell you were doing with yourself. I let you have your space for long enough. Tell me what the hell is going on." She blew a strand of her white blonde hair out of her face as she spoke, her green eyes concerned.

"Where do I even start?" I muttered, hoping she didn't hear me. When she didn't say anything, I tore my arm from her grip and opened the door, nearly running in to a girl rushing by me with a pad in her hand.

"Cam told me." She called out behind me. I jolted to a stop outside the bathroom, my entire body feeling as if a bolt of lightning had just shot through me.

"What?" I could feel my heart pounding against my chest.

"About Jacob. I'm sorry, Blake. I know how much you liked him." She offered me a sad smile, "Just know that I'm here if you want to talk about it."

*

I walked around the park by my house for a while, trying to process everything that was going on. I was surprised to find Cam on the swing set when I came back around the second time, his head bowed as he texted someone.

"Hey, stranger." I whispered, taking the empty swing beside him. His head whipped up quickly, the smile falling from his face at the sight of me.

"Oh, sorry. I'll leave." He grabbed his backpack from the ground and started to walk away, throwing it over his shoulder.

"Cam, come on." I followed him, jogging to catch up.

"I don't want to inconvenience you, Hart." I recoiled, stopping dead in my tracks at his words. I brought my hand up to my mouth and swiped my hand across my lips to prevent them from trembling.

"It would have been easier," He said quietly, "if you just punched me as hard as you possibly could. It would have hurt a lot less." I grabbed his arm, surprised when I felt something smear across it.

I blinked in surprise when I saw a heart drawn with a marker on his forearm. It was the same heart I used to drawn on him when we were kids, with our first initial on either side of the heart. Now, do to my smearing, it looked as if half of the heart had been swiped into a mess. How convenient.

"I'm sorry, Cameron. I-"

"Don't call me Cameron." He whispered. He looked exhausted, as if he were done trying to fight me.