Terrible Disaster (Ash Costello/Chris Motionless)

Chapter 20.

Chris POV.

Kuza and I walked as slow as we could into Ash's room, we opened the door, and stood behind the window, and just looked at her for a moment, before we had to face the harsh reality of what was about to happen. She was dabbing at her eyes with a tissue. You could tell she was trying to get herself together, but then she looked at us, and we knew we had to go in. I patted Kuza on the shoulder, and we both walked in together.

"Hi guys." Ash whispered her voice cracking a little. "So, what's going to happen is you both are going to get your yelling, and hatred out of the way right now let it all out, and don't hold back." She instructed.

"Okay, HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!" Kuza started, and I looked at him eyes wide, but he ignored me. "YOU'RE SO FUCKING SELFISH ASHLEY COSTELLO! I WISH WE NEVER WOULD HAVE FOUND YOU!"

"HEY!" I yelled cutting him off. "That's enough!" I said pointing my finger at him.

"Oh stop it Chris, you know you wish the same thing, but you won't say it out loud." He said in a calmer voice. "Admit it if we hadn't gone through all that trouble to find her we wouldn't be in this position, and at least she would still be living out her life even if it would be without us, she wouldn't be dying. Please admit that!" He pleaded looking from both Ash to I waiting for one of us to agree with him. Neither of us did, and I think he felt defeated, because he just sat down in the chair next to her bed. Ash looked at him for a moment, then she turned to me.

"Its your turn." She said quietly. I shook my head.

"No, I'm not going to yell at you." I said.

"You have to get it all out please. I know you both, and I know you both have way more to yell about I know you're both pissed, and hate me, so please get it all out now." She stated. Kuza snapped his head up, and gave her a look shit, here we go again.

"Pissed yes, but we dont hate you Ashley. No matter what you do we could never actually really hate you." He said grabbing her hand.

"Chris I need you to yell at me please, just once." Ashley begged me. I can't yell at her no matter what she does.

"I can't baby." I said moving her hair off her forehead.

"Yes you can." She said pleading me with her eyes to start yelling.

"I'm not going to let my last day with you be spent by me yelling at you, I couldn't live with myself if I did that, so no." I stated sitting in the other chair that was next to the one Kuza was in. Ashley sighed after a few more moments realizing that I wasn't going to start yelling.

"Where should we start?" She asked.

"Anywhere." Kuza answered.

"You two are going to need to look after each other, and be there for the other. Help each other out. I know this is the hardest for you, and Ryan-Ashley, but I know you are all strong enough to get through this. Do NOT leave, or call Motionless, or KUZA band quits. I know how much it means to you, and sure you will be hurt, but that doesn't mean you stop ding what makes you happy." She instructed.

"You are my happiness, without you my world is black, how are we supposed to keep up the bands if we have nothing to live for anymore?" I asked.

"Stop it both of you!" Ashley snapped. "You guys are acting like I'm the only thing in your life, and I know you both love me. I love you too! But I know for a fact that you also love your fans, and I'm not going to let you turn yourselves into black holes for the rest of your lives, because I'm gone!" She said.

"Don't take too much time off to grieve for me." She added.

"How much time is too much time to grieve for you?" I growled.