Two: Euphoric Salvation

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"Wake up
Take my hand and
Give me a reason to start again
Wake up
Pull me out and
Give me a reason to start again"
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Jason's POV:

I opened my eyes carefully, and scanned the room. The ceiling was white covered with small light spots; this is not my room. I heard strange beeping coming from the left. Turning my head slowly to the side, i faced what looked like a heart monitor. Great. The hospital. This is just what I needed.

I tried moving a bit but was stopped by a sudden sting in my left arm. Fixing my left wrist, i noticed, it was bandaged. My head started going wild. What happened?

I looked at my other arm. There was an IV connected to it to give me the energy I figured I lost.

My eyes traveled to my bandaged wrist once again, trying to get my brain to remember how I ended up here.

"Mr. Peterson? Oh you're finally awake" a female voice said as she entered the room.

"I'm Lilly, your nurse. Now tell me how are you feeling right now?"

"I- I don't remember what happened, my memory is a bit hazy" I muttered, completely distressed.

"It's normal Mr. Peterson you've lost a fair amount of blood and you've just woken up. Give it some time. Meanwhile I'll call the doctor to check up on you."

And without another word she left and I was left alone trying to get my head around what really happened.

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"Jason, please stop."

"Jay, please just look at me I'm begging you. Jason open your eyes".

"Jason"

"Open your eyes."
"Open your eyes".
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I woke up and sat abruptly gasping for air. I looked around in shock as it all came back to me. The pills, the broken piece of glass, the blood, and, and... Pamela. I closed my eyes and held my chest in my hand still trying to catch my breath, when I heard the door open.

"Jason, you fucking scared me! I can't believe it. I drove like a maniac when they called me!" The anger and disappointment evident on Matt's face.

My breath was steadier now but I didn't say a word. I couldn't even blink. I went back to staring at my bandaged wrist that was itching now.

"Jay, look at me. It'll be okay. You can't just keep on shutting me out, you have to talk to me, it's-"

"Pamela" I whispered before he could finish his sentence.

"Look at yourself, god damn it! I refuse to watch you destroy your life. Pamela is gone, you have to accept it. I don't even know how you survived last night! For god's sake-" He shouted.

I sighed, shaking my head. I didn't want to hear him anymore. My fingers were tracing now the white bandage covering my wrist ignoring the pain and the twitching. The memories of last night were kicking in hard.

"Why did you save me?" I spoke my thoughts out loud as I held onto my wrist tightly. "It was supposed to end right there..."

I fell back on the bed and closed my eyes. All I was hearing now was mumbling as he continued to lecture me.

There was no hope. Nobody will understand. Even Matt won't listen. Nothing will be the same. I was invisible. Senseless. Lifeless.

I let out a long breath I was holding, keeping my eyes firmly closed.

"Jason open your eyes", her sentence was on repeat in my head.

I shut out everything, even the sound of my own heartbeats. Having nothing but her soft voice filling my soul.

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