The Longest Five Years (Completed)

Reagan

A/N: A few intense scenes ahead! Thanks again for reading!!!
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Present Day

"Emmy!" I shout, shining my flashlight left and right as I step further into the woods. It's too dark out here, beneath the tall trees. I lift the hood of my favorite, thin dark blue sweatshirt over my head as a chill runs down my spine. "Emmy!" My throat is raw, my voice wrecked from all the screaming. I can barely manage to say her name.

A few feet to my right, the beam of Luke's flashlight shines deeper into the woods. I'm lucky my husband is trained for this kind of thing. It's scary as shit out here, but I'm safe with him. I just wish I knew our little girl is safe, too.

"Emmy, honey. If you can hear me, scream..." Luke's voice is rough, too. Broken. "Scream as loud as you can, Em. I'm coming for you, baby. I'll find you..."

We've been searching for at least twenty minutes. The police have not arrived. I've called back twice. I've never been more afraid in my life.

It's been 16 months since last saw Benson, but I'm still jumpy. Worried. I've told myself time and time again to stop being afraid. That this crazy, amazingly beautiful life with Luke and Emmy is mine and nothing in the world could take it away. But I haven't been able to let my guard down, for reasons exactly like tonight.

My eyes are swollen from crying, but I force myself to stop. I can't see where I'm going through these blurry eyes. My boots crunch through the broken twigs and branches and I nearly fall over a downed tree. Shit. My hands find my knees and I lean over, dizzy and sick to my stomach.

It's been a long day and I didn't eat nearly enough. Or drink enough water. I'm lightheaded. Exhausted. Emotionally and physically depleted. I just want Emmy back.

Luke stops and turns, the beam of his flashlight shining on me. "Reagan," in the glow of the light, his worry is evident. "Take it easy, baby," he breathes. He eyes me nervously, his stare stopping on my middle. "If I didn't think something would happen to you next, I'd tell you to go back to the cabin. You need rest.. You shouldn't be running ragged out here like this..."

But who is he kidding? There's no way I'd stay home knowing my little girl is lost, and he knows it, too. That's why he didn't try to stop me. We're both just in survival mode – running on pure adrenaline.

"Fuck rest," I shout, standing back up and wiping my eyes. "We're finding our kid. I'll sleep when she's safe in my arms," I pause. "I'll be fine. I promise," I reach out to squeeze his hand and he swallows. "I promise. I'm just tired. It's nothing else,"

I get it. I know what he's thinking, and I absolutely love him for it.

"Stay with me. No matter what," he says. "I'm serious, Reagan. Right next to me. No one in this family is getting hurt tonight," he says seriously. I squeeze his hand once more before we continue to walk.

"Emmy!" he shouts again, flashing the beam left, then right. Left, then right. We're about half a mile into the woods behind our cabin now. The lake is on our right, about a quarter of a mile away, and he takes my hand and leads me toward it. As we get closer, it's easier to see as the moon reflects off the water. My heart is pounding. I can hear the blood rushing in my ears. Wolves howling. Nothing about this moment feels right.

I'm overwhelmed. Horrified. She's not hiding. She's not teasing us; she'd have turned up by now. I was torn to leave the cabin, worried she'd show up and we'd be gone, but we've got neighbors about a mile away and I asked them to drive to the house and wait just in case. No, this is serious, and I'm not stupid. That little girl is my life, and taking her is the exact definition of breaking my heart.