Ch. 28 - The Anger, The Fear

6.7K 257 49
                                    

~A/N~ Just to reintroduce you guys again, this is Trey, everyone! He is played by an actor named Titus Makin Jr. Enjoy the update :)

Just a little farther.

My burning limbs surged forward as I continued around the track on my evening run. I'd been running for a little over 35 minutes, and by now even with my steady pacing I was definitely feeling it.

Running times had gotten considerably better for me over time, as I had made sure to make jogs a regular throughout my regiment. God knows it wasn't easy, I only really managed a successful run early in the morning, or in the late evening, two times of day where I would much rather be snuggled up between the sheets. Thankfully, I finally saw things paying off. My average had shaved down to a little over seven minutes per mile, and as much as I hated to admit it, Dean deserved part of the credit for that.

For someone who so clearly disregarded the rules of the society around him, he was surprisingly disciplined when he felt he needed to be. So whenever he detected any hit of laziness or procrastination from me, he'd weed it out right then and there. Come hell or high water, if I started a set it needed to be finished with perfect form. If I paused for a breather and lingered a few seconds too long or slacked on proper positioning, he would have me do it again.

Quite a few of those instances always earned him a pleasant number of hateful glares and threats of disembowelment, which he returned with warnings of his own, saying he'd give me a twice as difficult set later on if I didn't shut up. It may have seemed harsh, but I came to realize provoking me was actually strategic for him. He knew how to get a rise out of me, and when my body felt like giving up, he knew just how to light the spark again and have me powering through with a fire in my veins. Just like that, we fed off of each others energy.

But that was over now.

Regardless of the aches and pains, I was now walking the path on my own.

"Come on, come on!", I hissed to myself after I nearly tripped as my foot caught on the ground, a clear sign of exhaustion causing my limps to drag. The high energy indie rock pounding through my earbuds was proving ineffective against the straining of my muscles. Even the ground felt shaky beneath me. I willed my legs to move faster. The familiar feeling of light headed nausea washed over me and it quickly became apparent how badly my body wanted to stop. But, I could do this. I had to. My gaze was unsteady as I fought my utmost hardest to stay focused on the end of the circular track about 100 feet away from me. Just a little farther, I thought to myself as pushed with my last burst of energy.

With a sharp pain growing up my side and an eagerness to collapse, my feet pounded against the payment as they finally reached the track's beginning. Wobbly legs finally gave out and I dropped to my hands and knees onto the blacktop, not even bothering to pick up my earphones as they fell out when I rolled over onto my back. I could barely hear anything over the drumming of blood through my ears, my lungs greedily inhaled as much oxygen as they could with every breath. I closed my eyes, slowing evening my breathing, allowing myself to relax in a moment of peace.

A blazing sunset enveloped the sky above me, gently casting golden rays from the sun against the back of whisp-like clouds. They brightened with color, appearing fiery orange, to contrast against the sky's ombre of orange and muted blue. My second favorite kind of sunset, just behind the times when the sky would take on a rainbow of blue, pink, and magenta. Neither happened too often, so I always savored these evenings when they did occur.

Things always get worse before they get better, I thought to myself for probably the fiftieth time. It had become somewhat of a mantra for me over this past month. Despite my determination to continue, I couldn't escape the feeling that I was somehow in a rut. That, without a teacher, my skills were lacking. I could do as much as I wanted on my own, spend hours on the Internet looking for methods and improvement tips if needed. But the fact of the matter was, even with all that, I was still so new to this, bright eyed and baby-faced. I wasn't sure what direction to take myself or what little corrections made a big difference. I still find myself feeling lost whenever I look at the mass sea of grueling and inventive machines cluttering the rooms of any gym I walked into.

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙁𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙚𝙧'𝙨 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡Where stories live. Discover now