Nihilism ; Oikage [HIATUS]

The Quiet Grow Silent

-Kageyama-

It's been one week since Oikawa and I Watched Beauty and the Beast.

Coincidentally, it has also been one week since I've spoken to Oikawa.

There's no particular reason, it's more like a handful of reasons that have just morphed into one glob of confusion. For one thing, I enjoyed that movie, and didn't want to soil the one good memory I've had in awhile with Oikawa's irrelevant nagging. I also generally didn't feel like addressing him, because of the awkward situation that ended that night.

Well, awkward for me at the very least.

My blush.

The words "Anything for you, Tobio!" Echoed through my mind a mile a minute, and I'd be lying if I said it didn't worry me.

Perhaps it's just because I'm not used to other people being even relatively affectionate towards me. In fact, that must be it. Oikawa said something that caught me off guard and my body's first reaction was a blush. It makes sense.

I sigh, shaking my head.

What's unfortunate about the situation, is that I think Oikawa misunderstood the pink on my cheeks.

The next day, he tried talking to me at breakfast, and even dared to put a hand on my shoulder. Which, might I add, I hated with every ounce of my being.

In retrospect, I could have had a better reaction to the situation, telling him that I'm uncomfortable with human contact unless it's coming from my parents. Instead, I walked away briskly, not speaking a word. Now, this past week has been filled with him pestering me and me continuing to ignore him.

In the past few days, I began to notice that our lack of conversation has somewhat taken a toll on him, as he was generally more closed off and wouldn't tell me where he was going before he left the house.

It was unusual, since I've never seen him like this, but I don't feel like we're close enough for me to go up to him and tell him to cheer up. Plus, I'd also probably be shit at cheering him up because the last time I tried to cheer someone up, they ended up crying harder. I've been socially inept since the day I was born and speaking with Oikawa is no exception.

I'm currently sat on the couch, staring at the news report on the television. Some reporters are sat around a table babbling about politics, interrupting one another with false statements just to help their own cause. It's stupid and selfish, so I change the channel.

Scrolling through my channel guide, I pass some shows I recognize.

"Ghost Hunters? No... It's simultaneously stupid and creepy. House Hunters? No, I don't want to be jealous of people getting homes in the Bahamas. Cake Boss? No, don't need to be reminded how bad I am at baking." I continue to scroll, considering my options aloud.

Suddenly, I hear footsteps, and turn to see Oikawa stood there, rubbing his eyes as he's just woken from a nap. He yawns, then smiles over at me.

"This is the first time I've heard your voice in a week, Tobio." He says simply, taking a seat on the chair next to the sofa.

I immediately tense up, not wanting to reply. I look around, trying to find any way I could run away from this situation, even though I know I should stay here and deal with it.

Oikawa looks over at me.

"Someone's coming over today, Tobio." He says, and I simply nod.

He continues speaking.

"His name is Iwaizumi Hajime, and he's a friend I've had for a long time."

I nod again.

He goes on and on, telling me how him and Iwaizumi will probably watch a movie and that I'm welcome to join them, or that we all can eat together when they order food.

I give him the same response over and over, a slight nod of my head, but no words.

Once he's done speaking, he looks at me.

"Can I please hear your voice? The fact that you aren't speaking is making me nervous, Tobio."

I glance up at him, shrugging my shoulders. I walk away, ignoring him as he calls out my name over and over again.

--

Three hours have passed. Two hours ago, I heard the aforementioned Iwaizumi enter the apartment, but never left my room. I just don't see the point in socializing with someone I'll likely never have to speak to again. 

I had intended to stay in my room the whole night, but my bladder decided that betrayal was on the agenda, and I had to pause staring at my ceiling to go to the bathroom. It was annoying, really. My ceiling was just starting to seem interesting.

I leave my room, jogging towards the bathroom so I can go and then get back to my room.

Unfortunately, it won't be as simple as that.

As I pass the living room, I hear them. The sound of their lips, and Oikawa mumbling Iwaizumi's name. I turn my head, and see the two of them there, Oikawa sat in the lap of the other boy, both of them with their eyes shut as their lips mindlessly connect with the other's. Iwaizumi has his hands on Oikawa's back, Oikawa's hands roaming the other boy's body. 

They don't notice me. Of course they don't notice me. 

They're too... preoccupied. 

I know it shouldn't anger me. It really shouldn't. But I can't deny the fact that there is something off-putting about seeing my one and only acquaintance locking lips with someone I've never met before. 

I make a slight 'tsk' sound, averting my attention from the two of them, deciding to go to the bathroom and then head back upstairs.