Don't Let The Sun In Your Heart Decay [Muse - Matt Bellamy]

Chapter 14 - She burns like the sun

Chapter 14 - She burns like the sun

We rehearsed several of our songs from Origin of Symmetry and all from Showbiz. We were going to start traveling in two weeks, and each day we felt more nervous and rehearsed for longer periods of time.

We took a short break, and Dom left to the store to buy some cigarettes. I stayed with Chris, still in the instruments' room; he played the drums for a couple of minutes while I played my guitar. My thoughts took over my mind and unconsciously I stopped playing the guitar; I didn't notice until Chris broke me from my trance.

"Are you okay, mate?" Chris said breaking the silence. I stood silent for a few seconds, not knowing what to answer.

"I don't know...it's just that, Monica lately had been distant with me, although she'd stopped being a bitch to Logan"

"It must be pretty bad...I mean, you're calling her Monica instead of Mon" he answered and I realised what I had said before.

"I don't even know, anymore..." I sat over one of the amps and unplugged my guitar and played gently concentrating on nothing in particular.

"What are you thinking?"

"I don't know... The weirdest thing is that I'm not as worried as I should be..." I continued to play my guitar.

"Is it because of Logan?" I stopped playing and stared at Chris.

"It's pretty obvious you still feel something for her, and so does she, y'know?"

"Maybe that's why..." My voice faded away.

"What exactly do you feel for Monica?" It took me a while to come up with an answer.

"When you have this, toy or book or whatever, and then you find another one you like the most...and you twy to convince yourself that you still like the first one better, but you know that it's the biggest lie you will ever tell yourself" Chris didn't reply or say something whatsoever. So I continued "I've been thinking about bweaking up with her, but what should I tell her? It's not fair for her to be my girlfwiend when I have feelings for someone else"

"Telling her that would be suicide..." Chris joked and I alighted because he was right.

We heard the door open and Dom coming inside.

"I'm back, guys" Dom called from the living room.

Chris stood up, leaving me in the instruments' room. My eyes remained fixed onto the floor, and I kept thinking over and over again how these three last months have been. My whole view changed when I met Logan's eyes again, here, in the studio. I remembered Dom telling me Monica drove him crazy from time to time and how of an attention whore she was, I never understood what Dom meant, she always seemed pretty normal to me; until, my mind refused to believe I had gotten over Logan. Somehow, her presence opened my mind, now that Mon wasn't the only girl in my eyes, I understood what Dom meant when he said she was an attention whore; not only that, I started questioning and doubting many others things...Because of my feelings for Logan, I started noticing small details in Mon I didn't notice before; now Mon wasn't the only one on my mind, more like Logan was taking over unconsciously.

I heard Kelly's voice from the other side of the door, screaming something in excitement, but I didn't get to hear it very well...probably It was something about their baby, she was less than a month from giving birth; I felt a little bad for Chris since he wasn't going to be here by the time their kid was born. I also recognized Amy's voice, but didn't listen to Logan's. I felt a little bit nervous and my heart started beating harder. I left my guitar, and went to the small living room.