A Typical day in Lameton School

Chapter Seven

CHAPTER SEVEN

RECAP: Pun-Low is shot dead by a vengeful Haligram, whose main target had been Cho Han. She is dragged away from the scene. Just as the group falls into despair over the death of another friend, Mr Legitimate, Kaitlyn's super gorgeous-sexy-hot History teacher, arrives to the group's location, alive. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT????11POC

It would be a while before the rest of the group managed to clean the grime off Mr Legitimate and sit him down with a mug of whiskey (because Mr Legitimate liked his drinks strong), merely due to the fact that Kaitlyn couldn't keep her hands off of him. It was about an hour into her thirsty behaviour towards her History teacher that Baenab decided enough was enough (which was saying something because Baenab was the Queen of Thirst, as demonstrated by her inability to contain her hormones in the presence of Zafa). Once Kaitlyn was dragged away by Baenab and a decidedly grumpy looking Schuh Kopf, the interrogations began, starting with the most important one of all:

"Would you consider yourself still married?" Kaitlyn asked him. "I mean, technically, you did sort of die, making your wife a widow. So, like, now that you've resurrected like Jesus or whatever (Laybi opened her mouth to protest against this blasphemous reference but Harriet quickly taped her mouth shut), doesn't that make you officially a single man? That is, if you're ready to mingle. Also, I'm not eighteen yet but what the heck, it's a zombie apocalypse, so social conventions hardly count right?"

"Ignore her," Schuh Kopf said firmly, his face going red as he pushed in front of her. "The real question here is, how the bloody jahannam are you alive at all?"

"MISUSE OF ISLAMIC TERMINOLOGY IN A NON-RELIGIOUS CONTEXT IS A VIOLATION OF THE SACRED BELIEFS OF MMF—" Having managed to pry the tape away from her mouth, Laybi began to shriek out loud in a banshee-like manner but Harriet cut her off effectively with another piece of tape.

"Enough distractions," Baenab thundered and she prodded Mr Legitimate's bulging muscles with her gun in a threatening manner. "How are you alive? You have a minute to explain yourself before I shoot you."

A chorus of "BANEAB!" by an outraged Kaitlyn, "PLEASE DO" by Schuh Kopf and "I think I'm on my period you know," by Laybi (who had yet again removed the tape from her mouth) followed. Mr Legitimate gulped, his attention solely on Baenab – in a completely platonic manner, in case you get any ideas.

"I—I don't know," Mr Legitimate said honestly. "The only thing I can remember is being bitten by Randal Gill and this – this searing pain in my heeeeeart." He stopped, shutting his eyes to re-live the painful memories. He opened his eyes again. "I blacked out – I must've, because after that all I could sense was darkness around me, enveloping me. And then I felt this sensation of falling asleep. Next thing I know, I'm woken up by your guards and dragged in here. Also," he added, "I'd really appreciate if you could return my wedding ring back to me, Kaitlyn."

"Oh—erm. Sorry." Kaitlyn quickly returned the gold wedding band that she thought she had slyly slipped off Mr Legitimate's finger. A solitary tear slipped out of her eye as she watched as Mr Legitimate slid the ring back into its rightful place on his left hand.

"So—so there might be a cure for this virus after all?" Harriet murmured to herself, eyes widening. "Laybi!" she whispered, clutching her POC friend's hand with trembling joy. "You still have a future as an exotic stripper after all!"

"I have a new dream now," Labyi responded airily. "To be Yulicious Xang Pao's wedded and bedded wife."

"There has to be a cure!" Zafa clicked his fingers together. Baenab turned to look at him with a burning lust in her eyes. "Although we still don't know what the cure is...or how we can find it, or who came up with it..."