R.I.F.T. Play Video Games

Natsu and Happy play Dark Souls 3: The Tutorial

Long ago.. like.. er.. yesterday.. two brave souls decided that once and for all they would conquer the one game, that they had not yet conquered... So, journeying to the Academy City game store... they sought that holy grail of anus stabbing games...

Dark Souls 3.

"Are.. you sure you wanna buy this?" The game store owner said, frowning as he looked at the game cover.

"Yeah." said Natsu. 

"Aye sir!" said Happy. 

"You.. er.. have read the sign right?" said the store owner, pointing at a sign that said "Casuals will be raped repeatedly by spears through the anus."

"I love rap!" said Natsu. "Throw me a beat Happy!"

"Th-that's not how you read it.. oh nevermind, remember, we have a 90 day return policy." muttered the owner.

"Yeah! like we'd ever return it!" said Natsu with a laugh.

"Oh.. you'll return it.. " muttered the owner.

"Just shut up and take my money!!" Natsu roared, brandishing his Academy City cash card in the owner's face.

Natsu and Happy grinned as they burst into the guild hall later that day, Natsu brandishing the prized game in his hand. "WE GOT IT!! SUCK IT GRAY!!! WE'RE GOING TO BEAT IT!!"

Gray looked up and sighed. "Really guys? I said I got tired of dying and sold it.."

"YEAH!! WHICH MEANS IF WE BEAT IT I'M BETTER THAN YOU!!! SUCK IT GRRRRRAAAAY!!!" Natsu roared before running out of the guild, laughing like a maniac.

Mikoto sighed from where she was reading a book at the guild bar. "what game is it?"

"Dark Souls 3." said Gray.

"Yeah they're going to return the game.." Mikoto muttered serenely.

Back at Natsu and Happy's house, Natsu excitedly put the disc into the PS4, clapping his hands in delight. "Ya ready for the adventure of a lifetime Happy!?"

"Aye Sir!" Happy's voice issued from the voice chat, as the cat turned on Mikoto's PS4 back at Lucy's place and held up his controller in his little paws. "Let's do this! First we have to make our characters!.. but before that I think we get the opening cinematic!"

"Let's watch it then!" Said Natsu as the game began.

There was a pause after the cinematic ended.. and the Title Screen appeared.

"Well.." said Natsu. "I have NO idea what that all meant. What about you Happy?"

"Aye sir! No clue!" said Happy. 

"Hmmm. Alright!" said Natsu. "Let's ask Mikoto, she beat the game."

Natsu picked up his phone and dialed Mikoto's number, pressing the phone to his ear ever so casully. "YO! Hey Mikoto! Say, we just finished the opening cinematic for DS3!"

"Yeah, I"m aware, I'm watching Happy play the game on my system." Mikoto said, from where she was seated at Lucy's dining table.  "What about it?"

"Do you have any friggin idea what it means? Any of it?" said Natsu.

"Nope." said Mikoto.

"HUH!?" said Natsu. "B-but you beat the game!"

"Only cause I bought the Season Pass like a goober and didn't want to waste my money on non returnable dlc." Mikoto grumbled. 

"So.. uh.. any tips?" said Natu.

"Don't buy the dlc, then either commit suicide or return the stinking game." said Mikoto.

Natsu frowned. "Th-that doesn't sound right to me.."

"Trust me.. it's the rightest I'll ever be.." Mikoto whispered ominously before  hanging up.

"You'd think this game was hard." Natsu muttered. "Well.. time to get through the tutorial!"

3 minutes later...

"WOW! This tutorial is easy!" Natsu's knight character exclaimed as he ran through Untended graves, cutting down ghoulish undead enemies.

Natsu suddenly stepped through a gate, and stopped near a massive armored figure.

There was a sword in the motionless figure's chest... long with a spiral-like blade.

"Awwww... he seems like he's in pain!" said Natsu. "I'm gonna help him out! " 

Natsu slid the sword out of the giant armored figure's chest, and the figure rose to it's feet, grabbing a massive halberd!"

"Hello friend!" Natsu said. "My name's Natsu! What's your- WHAMMM!"

The Ludex Gundyr punched Natsu in the face, and he was sent flying off a cliff. 

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To be continued..