Lauren Sanders has been left to start a 'new' normal life with her aunt and cousin after her family died. Everybody knows almost everything except for two things: Lauren's parents' mysterious death and her schizophrenia.
Lauren goes out on a mission...
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When I got home after our trip to Los Angeles, I sense an anxiety attack coming. As soon as I went inside the house, my knees started shaking as my legs completely collapsed on the floor. I hear the voices of Zania and Clarissa rushing towards my side as they help me up from the hardwood floor.
The panic arises in my stomach, like a set of fireworks about to ignite the night sky. A tension formed in my face and limbs shortly after. My breathing began to become shallow and heavy until I felt like my heart was beginning to pound faster inside my chest.
As I rushed up the stairs towards my bedroom, I let go of Clarissa and Zania's grip on my arms. I fall into my bed, curling over my warm blankets like a cheese curl, as tears begin to escape from my eyes like a waterfall.
"Get her some water and her pillbox," I hear Clarissa say as Zania's footsteps become faint as soon as she leaves the room.
As I constantly cry in my bed, Clarissa caresses my back. I hear the footsteps of Zania again and then I see her approaching us with a glass of water and a small white box. Clarissa grabs the pillbox from Zania and opens the F box. F for Friday.
When I feel anxious, depressed, or have a panic attack, my doctor prescribed me some anti-depressants such as benzodiazepine to take.
Within the box, Clarissa grabs the pill and passes it over to me. I try to reach for it and then I swallowed. After this, Zania gives me a glass of water. I try to at least get a grip of my breathing as I let the medication do its part.
"That's it," Clarissa says, "Remember what Dr. Gregory told you. Deep breaths, okay?" she continues as she breathes along with me.
As seconds quickly turned into minutes, I began to feel a little calm and steady. I wipe away such tears as if nothing had happened. I'm looking at both Clarissa and Zania, watching them exchange their gazes.
Then, I slowly find myself falling asleep after feeling exhausted.
❀
"What happened?" Zania asks as she puts a hand on her waist, demanding an answer. "Where have you been? Savannah told me she hasn't seen you all day."
"I just went somewhere," I say, "I needed to find answers."
"Answers?" They both question me in unison.
"I went to an art gallery in Los Angeles," I say, ignoring the look in their eyes, "I saw my mom's painting there and I just wanted to look at it again."
When I look up, I see Clarissa's eyebrows drawn together. Zania has a confused expression on her face.
"Can you leave us for a moment, Z?" Clarissa says. Zania excuses herself out of my room without another word as Clarissa sits on the bed beside me.
