Soulmates ~ A Treebros AU

🖤 Chapter Five 💙

*TW: Self harm, self hate, drug use, suicidal thoughts*

Connor stayed in the forest, wondering about Evan at first, but soon getting high. Very high.

Evan stayed in the shower for over an hour, just sitting there. He couldn't believe how his soulmate acted, and was still covered in apologizes. He got out of the shower and wrote, "Go shower. I don't want to see your apologizes anymore."

Connor could barely read what Evan had put, and could barely respond. "U want to shower with me? But I thought you were mad silly." Connor wrote in chicken scratch writing. Connor laughed at the idea of seeing Evan in the shower.

"Are you high? I don't want to shower with you. I'm mad. More than mad, actually." Evan wrote, not able to believe Connor.

"Okay I'm coming over to your house right now ; )" Connor stumbled to his car and spent some time looking for his keys, although they were in his hand.

"Don't drive! You're going to die!" Evan wrote, his anxiety kicking back in.

"Death is cool." Connor grabbed his keys and put them into the, but sat there for a bit wondering how to drive.

"NOT FOR MY SOULMATE IT ISN'T!" Evan wrote, full of panic.

"Meh, no one cares if I die." Connor had given up on driving and was slamming his head against the steering wheel, tears threatening to pour.

"I CARE. WHERE ARE YOU?" Evan wrote before frantically putting on his shoes.

"No" was all Connor wrote before balling. The high was coming down, but so were his emotional walls.

"WHERE? ARE? YOU?" Evan wrote, about to cry.

"You don't care, it's fine. I've got it under control." Connor continued crying, and then grabbed his knife. Sharp, shiny, and clean like nothing else. It eased the pain, not caused it.

"I care Connor. Where are you? Are you at the orchard?" Evan was already crying silent tears, trying not to sob.

"Yeah, but you really don't have to come." Connor wanted to make sure that Evan was safe from him, especially after he yelled at the smaller boy. Connor's head suddenly struck with pain and he immediately pressed the knife to his skin to distract himself.

"CONNOR TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW." Evan wrote, sobbing. He didn't want Connor to hurt himself.

Connor didn't want Evan to panic, so he gave the best description he could."The fucking orchard. I don't know, some huge pine tree? Sort of near a clearing." Connor put the knife against his skin again, this time crying into the wound, causing a sharp, but "deserved" pain.

"I'm coming. Please don't do anything irrational." Evan wrote before running to the orchard.

"This is very rational, I deserve it after all. The poor kid is so scared because I'm a freak and an asshole." Connor didn't make any more cuts, but he didn't help his blood clot. He just sat there, crying, watching blood trickle along his arms, for what seemed like a lifetime.

"Connor! Connor?!" Evan yelled as he ran into the orchard. "Where are you? Please answer me." Evan wrote on his arm.

Connor yelled out between sobs, "Here!" He turned on the blinker of his car and unlocked it, but other than that just sat there meaninglessly.

Evan saw and ran towards the car. He got in on the passenger side and stared at Connor. "Why?" Evan muttered.

"I really fucked up. You don't deserve this- you don't deserve me. I don't know how to deal with people, you deserve someone who can." Connor stared out of the car window, tears slowly pouring.