Chapter 4

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Arnav was sitting in front of the operation theatre, where his life was fighting a battle between life and death, all thanks to him.

Seconds changed into minutes, minutes became hours and after three hours, which felt like a decade to Arnav, the door of OT opened, and the doctor came outside.

Arnav stood up quickly and asked the doctor, How is Khushi? She is fine na? Why aren't you saying anything? Speak up dammit, why are you silent? Say something! Tell me! Arnav grabbed his color as the doctor remained silent.

Sir, calm down and let me speak. The doctor patted his shoulder. First, tell me what is your name and realtion with the patient? The doctor calmly asked Arnav.

I am Arnav Singh Raizada. She is my wife. Replied Arnav. Wife, what a joke, his heart mocked at him.

I want to say something important to you regarding the patient. Believe us, Mr. Raizada, when I say that we are doing everything to save your wife but she is not responding at all. Its like that she doesn't want to live anymore. I am sorry sir but if she doesn't respond to our medications soon, we might lose... The doctors' next words were cut off by an angry Arnav who was furious on the doctor.

How could you say like that about my Khushi? My Khushi is a fighter. She will fight for her life. I will make sure of that. She can't leave me. She can't. He shouted not caring about the surroundings.

I love her. How can she leave me like this? No, she won't. She can't give me such big punishment for my mistake. He added broken.

Take me to her, doctor. I will talk to her. I will make her understand her importance in my life. She is my heartbeat. I can't live without her. Take me doctor. Take me to her. Please doctor, please. Arnav ended pleading to the doctor.

Dr. Armaan took Arnav into the OT. There Arnav saw Khushi lying on the bed. Many wires were attached to her body. Her left hand was connected with a drip. Her head was bandaged. She was taking slow and unsteady breaths. The machine showed her heart beats which were continuously rising and dropping.

Arnav went towards her and said, Can you please leave us alone? I want to talk to her.

Dr. Armaan, seeing the vulnerable condition of Arnav, said, Okay, but we are just outside. In case of emergency, just give us a shout.
Saying this, Dr. and his team went outside, giving them privacy.

Arnav slowly came towards Khushi and held her soft hand in his hard one, and caressed it.

Khushi, naraaz ho mujh se? Aise chup kyn leti hoi ho? Pata hai tum chup blkl bhi achi nahi lagti. He chuckled. (Khushi, are you angry with me? Why are you silent? You know, you don't look good when you remain silent.)

Tum tu haste hoi, muskarate ve, bolte ve achi lagti ho. Arnav remembered the moments where Khushi smiled and laughed freely, without any fear. (Actually, you look good when you laugh, smile and talk) 

Khushi mujh se baat nai krni tu na karo, lekin meri taraf dekho tu sahi. His voice got heavy as he swallowed a lump of tears. (Khushi, you don't want to talk to me, it's okay, but atleast look at me)

Tumhe pata hai na k main kitna ghusse wala hon. Aur usi ghusse ka nishana tm ban gai Khushi. Mujh se bht bari ghalti ho gai, please mjhe maaf kr do, Khushi. He broke down in tears. (You know na that how arrogant I am. And you became the victim of that anger. I made a grave mistake, Khushi. Please forgive me)

Main tmhare bughair nahi jee skta Khushi, nahi jee skta tmhare bina. Tm meri dhadkan, meri sansein ho Khushi. Koi apni sanson aur dhadkan k bughair bhi jee skta hai kya? He wiped his tears and again said softly, (I can't live without you, Khushi. I can't. You are my heartbeat, my breathings. How can somebody live without them?)

Tumhare aane se pehle main sirf sansein le raha tha Khushi, mjhe zindagi jeena tmne sikhaya hai. Meri berang zindagi mein rang tum laye ho, meri zindagi  main chahye andheron ki roshni sirf tm ho, Khushi, sirf tum. Aur agr tm hi youn mjhe chor kr chali gai tu main saans bhi nai le paon ga. Khushi hai tu Arnav hai, Khushi nahi tu Arnav ka koi wajood nahi. Shaid, nahi shaid nahi, yaqeenan main is duniya ka sab se bara badqismat insaan hon, janti ho kyn? He looked towards her face but she was still not responding. (I was only breathing before you came in my life, Khushi. You taught me to actually LIVE my life. You brought colours in my life. You are the only brightness of darkness residing in my life. Only you. And if you left me like this, I won't be able to breath at all. Probably, no not probably, definitely, I am the biggest fool on Earth. Do you know why?)

Kyn k main ne apne pyaar ko khud apne hi hathon se kho diya. Mjhe zindagi ne jeena ka moqa diya lekin maine sirf aik ghalat fehmi ki wajah se wo moqa zaya kar diya. Khushi, main hamesha tmhare chehre pe muskarahat dekhna chahta tha, lekin qismat dekho, main hi tmhare ankhon mein ansoon ki wajah ban gaya. He slowly caressed her eyes. (Because I lost my love with my own hands. Life gave me a chance to actually LIVE my life and I lost it, just because of a misunderstanding. Khushi, I always wanted to see happiness on your face, but see the irony, I am the soul reason for the tears in your eyes) 

Main bht bura hon Khushi, bht bura. Tm mjhe blkl bhi maaf na karna. Main tu tmhari mafi k bhi qabil nai hon. Lekin Khushi, mjhe chor kr mat jana. Jee nahi paon ga tmhare bina. Lout ao Khushi, lout ao. Mjhe mere gunahon ki itni bari saza na dena, Khushi, jee nai pao ga. Jee nai paon ga tumhare bina.
(I am really bad Khushi, really bad. Never forgive me. I am not even worth your forgiveness. But Khushi, don't leave me. I won't be able to live without you. Come back, Khushi, come back. Don't give me such big punishment for my sins. I won't be able to breath. I won't be able to live without you)

He got up and leaned towards Khushi. Softly placing his lips on her forehead, he gulped as if drinking her in.

I Love You, Khushi. He whispered.

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Gupta House

Garima and Madhumati were sitting in the living room. Their eyes were constantly moving between the clock and the door. More than three hours passed since Arnav left from here and even Khushi did not returned. They were really scared.

Garima voiced her thoughts, Jeeji,  what if Arnav babua thought that we are lying. The way he rushed out of the house, without saying anything. I am scared jeeji. He is not even picking his phone. Even Khushi bitiya is not home yet. What should we do?

Buaji was scared herself. She was cursing Shyam over and over. Why he came into their lives. Why DM brought him in their lives?

And most importantly, do Arnav believe them? What if Arnav vented his anger on Khushi? What if he misunderstood her? What if their relation got affected by it?

There were many 'What if's' and the two who can answer them were not attending their phones and that made the two ladies, more restless.

If only Buaji knew that their relation was based on misunderstanding, that their relation was already affected due to it. And also that Arnav not only vented his anger on her, but also married her in his anger. If only she knew. If only.

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Hospital

Just as Arnav was moving away from Khushi, she started breathing heavily and the cardiac machine started beeping fast, showing dropping pulse. Arnav shouted for the doctor.

Dr. Armaan and his team rushed inside and seeing the condition of Khushi, made Arnav go outside.

The door of OT was closed once again and the red-light glowed, indicating that the operation has started, again.


...

Love,
Neena💖

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