Odin's Prize

True Effort

With the first step outside, the wicked winter wind welcomes us to her morning greeting. Each footfall forward is a challenging, Nature's breath blasting against the terrain. The tops of the trees are bending, weaker branches breaking off, but the base remains standing solidly against the violence they are enduring. 

Right before stepping foot outside Odin's makes sure my hood is tied properly, repeating words on how to tie the knot correctly. His fingers able to move again, last night he had great difficulty trying to clean the shattered glass off the floor. 

It was a frail moment for Odin; his back was turned to me, on his knees trying to make his fingers work properly to pick out the embedded glass. 

"I'll help you clean it up." My voice was low, to match the lowness of Odin's spirit. His shoulders seem to bear a weight to them. This is not a side I have seen of Odin; his face holds a barely turned down lip, even his eyes held hard pressure.

When my hand goes to the side of his cheek, he leans into it before pressing a kiss to the spot my pulse beats. 

"I made the mess; it's me who needs to clean it up. I shouldn't have thrown it. The oil will stain if it's not cleaned up, I don't want stains in here, Charlie, not in our house." Odin's words are falling where his non-functioning hands are trying desperately to pull out the shards of glass. He takes a moment to look at both of his hands, before closing his eyes, shutting them tight. A hard swallow down from his throat with the way he's trying to regroup himself. 

"Odin, can you not feel anything?" Taking his hands in mine, squeezing them, even pricking the skin carefully with a nail.

"I have no feeling in them, Charlie. They're not working properly. I used three drops instead of one; I thought it would be enough." Odin's mouth straight lined with the edges dipping downward. 

"You should tell me before you experiment on me, Odin. I need to understand what you're trying to do, if I understand things clearly, then I think it would be easier on the both of us, don't you think?" He's momentarily quiet, his brows furrowing.

"I was trying to see if your skin went numb, I don't want to hurt you during the ceremony. I don't want to cause you any pain." His eyes focusing on mine, watching my face. 

"Odin, I was told that at the Claiming Ceremony that I would be taken by you, is that true?"

"It is, but it's only part of it, a small part of it." Odin's quick with his words. 

"Every Alpha and Luna of the Far North have to go through it. I want to do the right thing, with the greatest amount of honorable possible.  Prepare everything exactly how the Old Ways states." 

"I'm not sure I can go through with it, Odin. To be claimed and mated in front of the pack, in front of visiting packs. It's not something that holds any value or honor to me." 

"I understand, the Ceremony for you holds nothing for you. For me, it's my life's work. I have been working towards the Ceremony my whole life. Preparing for it, gathering everything that's needed. I fight my greed to consume all of you on a minute to minute basis. I want to take what I can't have when ever I just look at you. I fight myself and I feel sometimes I will lose my own fight. I just have to keep reminding myself that you are worth my inward fight, that you are worth walking the path of honor." His voice dips lower, dropping octaves to barely heard sounds.

"I'm just not sure, Odin. If I'm honest with you, I don't think that I can do that. It's something that is special and should be done privately."

"I understand, Charlie. That's why the Lunas of the past said to make it easier on the Lunas if they weren't from the Far North, to have them drink away the Memory."