My Book of Randomness

Crack Chapter #1

So this chapter was sort of requested by TheWhiteSiren and is a parody of a chapter from my fanfiction A Hero's Journey. It's a Ghirahim x OC story (sorry for my cringe) and if you're interested, go ahead and check it out! Enjoy!
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"WAKE UP DAMN IT!"

Link's eyes shot open and he jumped up from his bed. He panted as his heart raced within his chest.

At the very end of his bed was Hiku and Ghirahim, both with their arms crossed over their chest. Except the princess seemed more agitated than the demon lord...

"Come on, Link! We're heading over to Death Mountain and we can't go without you!" she huffed. "Can't believe this lazy kid is Hylia's 'chosen hero'..."

"Hey! I'm older than you ya know!" the blond scowled.

"Whatever. Let's go already!"

The red haired girl, not waiting for the hero to reply, walked out the room without another word. Link groaned as he got up from his spot on the bed and started to get dressed. He was putting on his green tunic over his chainmail and shirt when he heard a chuckle from the demon behind him.

"What's so funny?" he asked, clearly annoyed just by his presence.

"Oh, you must pardon me Skychild. I just couldn't help but laugh at the little scene between you and the princess..." he smirked. "She just simply isn't a morning person, and gets cranky very easily. Don't worry. She'll be back to her usual self by noon."

Link said nothing to him, and simply finished getting ready. Once they had everything, Ghirahim and Link left to meet Hiku at the gate leading to the trail up the mountain. With Link leading the way, the three rebels made their way to Death Mountain, home of the Gorons.

Ω

"Ah! Link, you have returned!"

Upon their arrival, the trio were greeted by two rather unfriendly Gorons. Things started to get heated until the blond introduced himself, claiming he was the human who returned the ancient relic to the tribe. The two creatures then nodded and guided the three of them to the elder. The old one smile at the sight of his companion, but his face quickly contorted as he gazed towards the other two.

"But why are these two here?"

Link suddenly felt tense as he too turned to his traveling companions. He was about to explain the situation until Hiku stepped forward.

"You may already know me as a general in Ganon's army. But please, allow my friend and I to explain ourselves..." she gave a respectful bow to the elder, Ghirahim soon doing the same.

The Goron looked at them skeptically, but allowed them to speak. "Very well. Go on."

"My name is Princess Hiku Dragmire," she said, earning a few gasps from the crowd around them. "I served my father, Ganondorf, in his army for many years. But I have decided that his plans for Hyrule should not have become a reality, and I am correcting my mistake and helping your hero to raise an army against him to invade the castle."

"And this is Demon Lord Ghirahim," she gestured to the older being next to her. "He was my commander at one point, but then became my caretaker and servant. He is also a close friend, and will be joining us in rebelling against my father."

"Please, Elder," Link pleaded. "We need your people's strength to help us break into the castle. Will you help us?"

The elder stared intensely at Hiku, gazing into her eyes. He saw something truly admiring, and smiled.