Not so "Fresh"

Pretend is a Wonderful Game

Decans didn't improve. But, he didn't get worse either. He was stuck in the same lifeless state, and he would stay that way for God only knows how long. Fresh couldn't handle it if Decans left him. He had already lost so much. Everybody around him knew this too. He had been broken too many times to last through this.
Even Error couldn't deny that he felt the slightest bit of pain for him. Decans didn't deserve what happened to him. He deserved anything but that. And while Error wasn't exactly fond of it, he tried to be there for Fresh. He kept an eye on him and tried to be the brother Geno had been. Fresh would've appreciated it so much more if every time he looked at Error he didn't see the face of the person that had hurt his best friend. The person who had potentially killed his best friend.
CQ had tried to keep Fresh and Error away from each other, but no longer because of Error. It seems the tables had turned a lot since what had happened. Sugar and Paperjam said they were there for Fresh if he needed to talk, and they had stuck true to their word. It wasn't unusual for them to show up at 2 o' clock and stay 'till 7.
And Fresh was trying. Everyone could tell he was tired, or upset, but they didn't comment on that. He was glad for it. He wasn't ready to talk about it yet. Geno had just been ripped away from him-- he couldn't lose Decans too.
So everyone pretended that it was fine. They smiled and laughed and joked like nothing ever happened. They smiled as if Decans wasn't laying deadly still in a hospital bed. They laughed about things that didn't really matter.

They didn't get to pretend for very long.
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"We're sorry for your loss." The doctor spoke the words he said to everyone who had ever experienced this. Hollow words coming from a person who had never known Decans. Who had never seen him smile, or laugh and been given a hug. Someone who had never been through the darkest times with him, or someone who had never shown every side of themselves to him. Someone who didn't learn a thing from him or listen to him joke about things you shouldn't joke about. Someone who hadn't known Decans.
CQ gripped Fresh's hand tight enough for it to hurt. He didn't react. He didn't feel it. Come to think of it, he didn't feel anything. He didn't want to feel anything.

A tense second passed. Two. Possibly, three, four, maybe even a couple minutes.

"Fresh, I--" CQ started.

"It's fine." Fresh deadpanned. CQ startled, as she had expected him to break down in tears, not console her.

"Can we just go home?" His voice shook a little bit as the harsh reality settled around his weary soul.

CQ's heart ached to wrap her arms around him and tell him it would be okay. But she knew how it felt for those words to come from someone who didn't really know the one you lost. The pain caused by taking those words to heart and nodding. She had seen the boys' friendship blossom the very first time she had met Decans. She hadn't gotten much time to speak to him or get to know him, but the mother knew he was sweet.
CQ remembered the way he squirmed and introduced himself, and the way Fresh smiled and took him from the situation. She remembered how surprised she was to see he actually cared for someone. She remembered the looks they gave each other and the inside jokes she had never learned to understand.

CQ pursed her lips and nodded. "Yeah."
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"W-What if she doesn't like me?" Decans mumbled, letting Fresh gently pull him along.

"Brah, who could not all up like you?" Fresh replied, snorting.

"What if your brothers think I'm weird?"

"Trust me Deccy Dec, ya don't gotta worry about dat."

"What if--"

Fresh stopped, turned around, and gave Decans his best serious face. "Why are you all up wiggity-wiggity-worryin' so much? You're gonna make yourself all up sick."

Decans studied the pavement. "I just wanna be careful. F-First impressions are everything, right?"

Fresh sighs, giving Decans' hand a light squeeze. "Deccy Dec, ya don't have anythin' to worry about. You'll be a-okay. Promise."

After a moment's hesitation, Decans nods. Fresh smiles and hops up onto the front porch of a house.

Decans squints. "What are you doing?"

"We're all up already here." Fresh snickers.

"Oh."

Decans fiddles with the drawstrings of his hoodie for a moment. "Well, are ya gonna just stand there all day?"

Laughing, Decans looks up. He takes in a breath to say something.

" "
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Fresh opens his eyes. It's still dark. Silent, Fresh sits up and checks the clock.

4 am.

He thinks about lying down and trying to go back to sleep before deciding against it. Hopping out of bed, he slips down the stairs and into the kitchen. His feet clack against the cold tile as he opens the fridge. The light temporarily blinds him. Fresh grabs a cup of water and heads into the living room.
The T.V's light dances on the walls. It's raining. He checks the clock.

5 am.

Expecting to hear CQ get up from her computer, he drinks the cup of water. It's empty.

6 am.
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Sitting up for the second time, Fresh groans. He checks the clock.

7 am.

He glares at it for a bit longer. It's Saturday, right? Yeah. He lays down and pulls the cover over his head. It's still raining. A shiver escapes from Fresh, despite the fact that he's hot under the heavy comforter. He remembers what day it is. It's Saturday. He presses his eyes shut. The funeral's tomorrow.

//aaaaaa sorry this took so long qwq. I had the w o r s t case of writer's block for this story but I'm back and ready to publish some chapters! As always, if you have any questions or concerns, I'll be happy to answer them. <3