You Found Me

6

I get out my phone right away and call Audrey to tell her about our date and what to do later. "Hey red what's up?" I bite my lip just thinking about my day so far. "It was perfect. We had some Starbucks and while we were looking for my books I ran into and old friend then we went out for pizza and when he dropped me off we kissed."

"I can already tell he's the one. I've never seen you this happy in a long ass time and you're already gushing over him like a kid." She's not lying. "Ok enough about my date. What are we doing later?"

"Smuggler's Cove and I'll pick you up at 7?"

I haven't been there in forever. "Okay sounds good."

"Alright be ready girlie." We hang up and I sit there bored not knowing what to do. I see my new books on the counter and then remember to call Valerie. I scroll down and don't see her name under the V section then I see "Your Gal Val". She hasn't changed a bit. Well her personality hasn't.

I call her and she picks up on almost the last ring. We're on the phone for almost two hours.

Turns out she's been with her boyfriend Brad for almost two years now and she should be expecting around Christmas time. Her sisters Christina and Maggie also moved out here for college and they're having a get together at Valerie's apartment so she invited me over. She made me promise to take Nathan if we're still together by then.

She said I could invite a few friends too if I wanted and I only have two friends which are Audrey and Mark and I've been trying to get them together for months now which is perfect. It's pretty obvious they have something for each other.

I haven't seen her family in years and the last time I saw them they were so young and cute. I actually haven't seen or talked to my sister or mom in a few months I wonder what they're doing for thanksgiving.

"Arista?" I haven't heard her voice in so long I don't even know why we haven't talked. "Hey Stacy, how've you been?" She lets out a little laugh. "I've been good actually. Are you okay? How've you been? What's up?"

"I'm good I just came across this thing and remembered about you and mom and I was wondering what your plans were for thanksgiving."

"Well me and mom were going to call you and invite you to come here and stay the weekend or something."

"Actually Valerie and her sisters moved out here and invited me and a few other people to her place for dinner and I was thinking you and mom could stay the night at my place?"

"Yeah that sounds great but I thought you weren't talking to Valerie anymore?"

"I ran into her today and she's actually doing really good. She has a job, a boyfriend, their own place, and she's pregnant."

"Wow that's crazy tell her I said congratulations and I'll let mom know and yeah we'll be there."

"But you haven't even asked mom yet. How is she by the way. I feel bad that I haven't talked to you guys I was just going through a lot of shit."

"I'm pretty sure she'd want to go and see all of you than just sit here alone with us two so yeah we'll be there. And she's doing good actually we're just here doing our business."

"Okay great I'll keep you guys updated and I'll see y'all next week! Bye Stace."

"Okay bye baby sister."

Shit it's already six I need to get ready.

I can't figure out what to wear now great. I'm scanning through my closet and see a black laced shirt and choose to wear some jeans and matching laced heels.

I pick my hair up in a messy bun and throw on some dark makeup with red lipstick and I'm ready to head out.

It's 7:28 when I hear knocking at my door and see Audrey in a royal blue short sleeveless dress with black knee high boots and looking sexy as fuck like always.

"Damn you're smoking tonight." She says licking her lips and leaning in my doorway. We start laughing and leave. We get to the bar which is about 25 minutes away usually but it took us 40 to get there due to Saturday night traffic.

We get inside and I order my martini and Audrey's usual Budweiser. "So do you remember how I told you about my old bestfriend from years ago?" She puts down her beer and looks at me concerned. "Yeah what about her?"

"Well we ran into each other like I had told you and she invited me to her apartment for thanksgiving. She said I could invite a few friends if I wanted and Nathan and my mom and sister. So with that I was wondering if you and Mark would want to come and spend time with us?"

"Who all is going just us or is she inviting more people?"

"She's inviting her two sisters, my sister, my mom, you, Mark, and Nathan. Oh, and her boyfriend lives there with her. So there's gonna be about ten people there. Luckily she's good at cooking."

"Okay sounds good and you're inviting Mark?" She looks at me with kind of a smile. Okay it's time to tell her.

"Audrey you like him, he likes you, it's so simple you guys just don't make a move. So I'm making it for you." She takes a long drink of her beer and says "Fine I'm not gonna lie I do like him but I just wasn't expecting us to be together I mean I just looked at us like coworkers and friends you know what I mean?"

"I do which is why I'm trying to get y'all together." We order seconds of our drinks and start talking about our personal lives and childhood and eventually get so wasted we have to take an uber home.

It's 1:18 when I get home and flop down on my couch thinking about how much fun I've had the past few days and how much more I'll have the next. I suddenly sober up with what I haven't heard in a long time.

What did you do to deserve all this attention and happiness? Nothing so what are you doing? You're taking it all for granted and getting blinded again. Nathan doesn't or won't love you and your family lost contact with you cause you're a bitch and they don't need anyone like you in their lives.

"No that's not true." I say running to the restroom hearing the voice come from there.

But think about it. Why did they stop talking to you? Valerie stopped because you basically told her she was a piece of trash and you hurt her. Your mom and sister stopped because you left them. Nathan is going to stop once he realizes I'm here and he's not gonna like that. Face it Arista I'm the only one that will never leave your side. I'll always be the only one who's here for you.

I suddenly feel myself reaching to the back of the medicine cabinet grabbing the blade I haven't used in years. Then without realizing what I'm doing I feel a sharp sting on the opposite hip of my tattoo and see blood running down my leg. I didn't even realize I pulled my pants down.

I'm here and I'm going to keep reminding you that you should've just jumped when you had the chance and now Im going to be here all the time no mater what.

I drop the blade to the floor and lay on the floor myself trying to comprehend what had just happened. I had completely forgotten about this. This is another reason I wanted to jump. I can't even handle myself. I curl up on the floor crying and fall asleep.