Insane

Chapter 31

This is your chance, Alice.  

For once, I agreed with the voice. I turned around to find David, standing there, acting 'innocent'. Here's my chance. I try once. I could die, since he has a knife, but I tried. 

"Well, what's wrong, little girl?" I took a deep breath, and jumped up from my bed. Before he could know it, I tried to punch him. Then something unbelievable happened. When I touched him, his figure dissolved into mist. What just happened? I grabbed my head, trying to understand what just happened.  

It was your imagination, Alice.....

It was....what? Did I........did I just imagine him standing there? I probably....hallucinated......maybe I have a fever again! I felt my forehead.......cold. It didn't show any signs of fever. Was this.......was this a delusion? A delusion of insanity? I can't. I can't allow myself to go insane! It's not happening! I'm not going to go mad, I'll fight against it! 

Yet it's no use.........

It is! I'll do anything so I don't end up like him!

Alice, you just tried to kill him. You tried to kill your  delusion  of him just now. You will lose your sanity, and you know it...........

I won't! I.......won't.......Someone came in. 

"Are you alright, Alice? You weren't in the living room, so.........why aren't you there, turning your eyes square?" 

I smiled a bit at her remark. "I don't know. I didn't feel like watching TV anymore." 

She looked worried. "Are you sure? There wasn't anything interesting?" I shook my head. "So, what're you going to do?"

 I shrugged. I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do for the next few days. The smartest thing would be to pack up and move to Mexico, but I don't think I could actually pull that off. The most realistic thing is trying to live a halfway normal life. I was so deep in thought that I only then realized my mom wasn't in my room anymore. "Mom?" I asked. 

"Just off to the store! I'll be back in a minute!" Alright. She's just going for a little walk to the store. No worries, right? I'm not going to suddenly become delusional again, am I? I giggled, uneasily. I then realized exactly what I was doing. I sounded weird. I tried to hide it. What if I go so insane I.....I kill someone? What if I kill someone close to me? What if......what if I kill my own mother? I wouldn't do it. I can't! But what if I couldn't control myself? She would die at my hand. I will try to control myself, I will try to stay myself, but what if I can't? It's probably better if he killed me. He should. But until then, I'll fight. I will fight. Oh god, what am I doing? I'm fighting with myself. I need to do something else. Watch TV, perhaps? Not the news, though. I went to the living room and turned it on. Static. I changed the channel. 

"We have our ways, Mr. Smith." Channel switch. 

".....then you mince the celery and throw it all into the pot!" Cooking? Nah. Channel switch again! 

"I like you, you li-" SWITCH THE CHANNEL! TO HELL THERE IS NO WAY I AM WATCHING THIS ABOMINATION! 

"I name thee carrionite!" I watched this way too many times. Switch. 'Sources report to have seen someone with such a smi---' I accidentally switched the channel. What was that? Was he seen? I switched back. 'Here are some of these report: "There was this girl. Seventeen or something. She was just walking around the park, having a snowball fight. That killer. She should have been arrested! She killed that poor boy!" 

Are they talking about me? Must be. I have that smile and I was in the park, having a snowball fight. They think I'm a killer? I'm not! I didn't......They're blaming Michael's death on me! I don't even know the kid! 

"I'm back, sweetie!" I hardly heard my mom's words. She came into the living room, a bit covered in snow, and saw me sitting there. "Are you alright, dear?" I couldn't answer. On top of everything, people are blaming David's shit on me! 

Mom heard some of the other people talking on the TV. "Are they talking about.......about you, Alice?" 

I nodded. The police know it wasn't me, though. I don't even know why the media is stressing about this so much! There's so many serial killers in the USA, and they pick David? He shouldn't even be damn mentioned. Also, if he could be caught, he would've been caught back when he first tried to kill me. 

"Get up, Alice! I need you to help me with these!" I shut the TV off, and went to join my mother.