❝ʜᴏᴘᴇʟᴇss❞|| vkook

8. if

my lovely cutaes, I have finally written a chapter for you~this is a special chapter cause is dedicated to you!!thank you so much for the endless amount of support ❤️

Taehyung leaned back in his chair, hunger satisfied.

"Thank you so much, Mr.Kim. You're food is always amazing."

"I know right? I missed it back at uni," Jimin said, eating a spoonful of rice.

Jin smiled as he ruffled the boy's hair.

"Nothing will ever taste as good as my food. Remember that in the future."

Jimin smiled at his father, cheeks stuffed with rice.

Taehyung smiled also at the sweet family, then looked down at his hands and frowned. He broke this sweet family.

"Is something wrong, Taehyung?" Namjoon asked, noticing the sadness in Taehyung's eyes.

"No. No, nothing's wrong." Taehyung forced a grin.

Namjoon raised an eyebrow.

"You sure?"

The boy nodded.

Looking at him one more time, Namjoon went back to his dinner.

"You should eat some more too. You've gotten skinnier since the last time I saw you."

Taehyung shifted his eyes to the left. Jungkook was leaning on a pillar, arms crossed.

Taehyung put his head in his hands. Between school and seeing 'Jungkook' all the time, his brain hasn't gotten much rest.

"You're not even going to look at me?"

The boy's hands moved in front of his face as he shook his head.

"Fine, be that way."

Quiet filled the room.

"I'm still here, you know."

"Except that you're not," Taehyung mumbled.

"Did you say something, Taehyung," Jin asked.

"I said except that you're not. He's not. Jungkook isn't here."

Everyone put down their utensils and gave Taehyung a worrisome—and at the same time grave— look.

"Taehyung," Jimin started, "it hurts to say this, but, we know. We know he isn't here. We feel the absence. The void. The emptiness. That one happy presence is no longer here." His eyes began to fill with tears. "You're not the only one that's hurting."

Taehyung bit the inside of his cheek.

"I- I'm sorry. So sorry."

"Taehyung please," Jin spoke, "it wasn't your-"

"Except it was! It was my fault! If I had made him stay home from the party, it wouldn't have happened! If I hadn't stayed at his house, it wouldn't have happened! If I hadn't agreed to be his partner for math, it wouldn't have happened! If I had learned to stand up for myself, it wouldn't have happened! If I didn't exist, he would be alive!"

Taehyung stood up from the table and walked out of the dining room, wiping his cheeks with his hands. Before leaving, he stopped in the doorway and said,

"Don't you see? It was all because of me."