Over and over again

ch29

Naria pov
I was staring at king as he held vontae having there father and son bond they were so cute but that's what hurt the most he was such a good dad. ever since he raped me its like I've been wishing he was a bad dad so I could have a reason to keep vontae away but he's not so I cant do that

King- yo

Nia-huh

I said getting out of my thoughts

King-you don't here me talking to you

Nia-no sorry what did you say

He stared at me for a min before he spoke

King-I said why you aint get his ears pierced like you said

Nia- um I've been busy

King-with?

Nia-why do you care

King-look i'm not trying to fuss with you or be in yo business ight especially not in front of my son, I was just asking because if you really don't have time like you say i'll just take him my self

Nia-no, I mean not like that but no i gotta be there

King-no you don't i'm his daddy

Nia-not like that king, I mean Imma cry if i'm not there. This my baby boy, Imma cry like a baby

He laughed a deep laugh. The same laugh that use to get me wet and still do. Yea he raped me but I couldn't help but still what him to ben-

King- yo

King said snapping his fingers in my face

Nia- shit im sorry-

My eyes got big when I realize what I said

Nia- sorry tae baby mommy didn't mean to cuss

King laughed at me again

King- he really changed you man

Nia-what you talking bout

King-you use to cuss all the time now you saying sorry to him and he didn't even hear you because be sleep

Nia-oh

I said looking at my feet

Nia-yea everybody been saying im getting soft but ion think so. I just wanna be a good mother you know, like my mother was to me before she left. She was so great, and I missed her so much when she left I felt broken. And I don't ever want my baby boy to go through that

I didn't even realize I was crying until a tear hit my leg

King-hey look at me Nia

I looked at him after wiping my eyes

King-you gone be ight,ight? I keep telling you it wasnt ya fault she died. She wouldn't want you to be doing all this crying. I know we not on the best terms but im here for you forever and always and dont care if we in a relationship or not im going to always care 

I just laughed it wasnt a happy laugh it but that's all that came out

Nia-you wanna know something funny?

King- wassup

Nia- she not even dead man, she faked her death and said it was what's best

King-but I thought Shawn was there when she died, wasnt she shot

Nia-it-it was all fake she just left us

I said as I broke out crying, king put tae down and came over to me and held me

King-how did you find this out

Nia-they came to Shawn's house like everything was all good and told use. Shawn snapped and kicked them out

King-and how do you feel bout it

Nia- I don't even know how to explain how I feel, I cried for two days because of it and im still setting hear crying when I go out i act if things are fine but im not fine I need to vent and ion wanna vent to dimp She got to much on her plate already, she got twins she bout of get married and she gotta make sure Shawn is good. Me , I have no one but my son I feel so alone my brother is mad at be because I won't let him get at you, everybody doing there own thing and im just like what's the point of me being here but then i look at my son and he's my reason, he's my world 

King- hey look at me, you got me ight you have always had me ok. Im sorry about what I did im not gone say I was drunk because I shouldn't have done that at all i was way outta line. It was all wrong and im sorry it shouldn't have happened. I just hope you can forgive me and not take my son, because just like you feel like he's the only thing you got i feel the same way 

Nia-I forgive you and i was never going to take him away from you. You are a great dad I wouldn't want him to grow up with out his dad

King-thank you nia for real man. You don't know how much that means coming from you

Nia- no problem.

King-Nia

Nia- wassup 

I said finally look in his face to see that he was crying too

King- can you come back home now. I can't sleep without you man. Ive only slept one time since you been gone I feel so drained

I just put my head down and played with my fingers

Nia- I don't know bout that. I don't think we have had a long enough break. I still gotta think a bout some things. I gotta get myself together first,let me deal with my parents first then ill think about us

King- ok I can understand that. At least you didn't say no

Nia-yea

King-I still love you

Nia-I still love you too

There was a silent but it wasn't uncomfortable it was just like both of us was just thinking bout every thing that was just said it was a good quite

King- hey well can you at least take a nap with me before you have to go?

Nia- yea sure

King-can I hold you ?

Nia- yea

I texted dimp to let her know I was good and laid down and let king lay on my stomach as I played in his hair until we both fell asleep

Yea he raped me but I forgave him and I wouldn't rather be any where else. He and only he has my heart I don't know what I would do if I didn't have him. no body's perfect but he is perfect to me and I love him so so much