Hold Me Back || Prinxiety

Prologue

(Anxiety's POV)

Song - Ruelle: Bad Dream

I tried, I really did. It was never meant to get to me, not in this way. I tried to toughen up. Take the constant hostility the other sides gave me. I tried to ignore Logan's silent sighs of discontent when I approached, Patton's obvious favoring of the other sides. Every time I entered a room, the air would change, eyes would glance at every other person in the room, saying what nobody spoke. "Why won't Anxiety just leave us alone?"

Feels like I'm falling into the world, into the world

It was like I was a disease, no one would ever touch me, look at me, in fear of being... corrupted. In the others' eyes, I am merely a glitch, a practice holding Thomas back.. a malfunction. Again, no one ever said it... but they all knew.

I can't control it, I hear it calling

I wish they knew how I felt. I wish I could simply tell them how much it affected me. How their aggressive eyes kept me up long into the night, how their biting whispers, shared when they thought I wasn't listening, made it impossible to choke down a simple meal. But I stayed quiet, let my thoughts consume me. Why bother voicing my opinions when no one cared enough to listen?

Down in my soul, gripping my bones

Hell, maybe they were right. Maybe I was just a burden on Thomas's life, a dragging, inescapable force that stopped him from achieving, from making the impossible probable. I've tried, many times, to free Thomas of my presence, my domination over his life. It would be better that way - but each time I've stopped myself. My lack of courage and my selfishness always combine, transforming into a powerful influence I can't escape. Because of this, I've lost the only person ever on my side, myself. I loathe myself more than any of the other sides do, and that is worst of all.

It won't let go

Their hatred was no secret. I knew this, but I still let it get to me. I let Prince's words cut me down, break the fragile wall that kept all the bad, consuming emotions hidden. I went over the edge.

Wake me up, won't you wake me up?

I almost did something I'd regret forever, almost did something I've always wanted to do

Caught in a bad dream

I almost showed him my vulnerability...

A\N

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