Freckle Stars [MODERN LAMS Oneshots/Shorts]

Cliche: Soft

[Hh, well you find something new in each of these, the Cliche chapter, TW: Anxiety/Panic Attacks]

John sat on the couch of his apartment, his arm around Alex in the dark room, the only light being emitted from the dim, unnatural glow of the television as the two of them rested their feet on the footstool in front of them, legs tangled up together under a comforter that went up to John's waist and Alex's chest, but both were quite happy with this as Alex snuggled closer into John's side, John happily giving him a loving squeeze before both boys yelped at a staticky noice coming from the TV before it shut off completely. The silence was deadly as suddenly the entire room went dark, and John was now holding onto Alex even tighter.

"Shit, Alex, it's dark." John whispered before the drumming rain began to pick up outside, and immediately John's worries were flipped to Alex, "Al, you okay?"

There was silence for a moment before the wind picked up.

"Yeah, why?" Alex murmured.

John still held him close, scared himself as he wasn't all too fond of the dark, "I- don't know where my phone is."

"That's alright." Alex nodded.

John leaned back on the couch before pulling the comforter forward and over his head, also pulling it over Alex's head as the other was significantly shorter.

"John, are you a-lright?" Alex asked just above a whisper.

"You're in my arms, I've got all I need." John cracked a grin, though he knew Alex couldn't see him.

"Why are we suffocating under a comforter if we can't even see? What- what difference does it make?" Alex frowned.

"I makes me feel safer..." John mumbled.

"A-alright." Alex sighed.

"You...you're sure you're alright, Alex?" John sounded genuinely concerned.

"Why wouldn't I— why wouldn't I be?" Alex scoffed.

"Well, ...you um, you told me you're not particularly all that great with Uh, with storms and such and-"

"I'm fine, John, haven't I said that- that enough?" Alex crossed his arms from underneath the comforter.

"—And you stutter when you're nervous, it's subtle but it's noticeable."
John pointed out.

"I'm not stutter- I'm not stuttering!" Alex fought back fiercely.

"Yes, Yes you are, you just did- it's," John sighed, "It's subtle, like you don't repeat letters, you repeat words."

"None sense." Alex huffed.

Just then a bright flash of lighting lit up the room, shining through the comforter to reveal tears glazed over Alex's eyes and evident on his cheeks.

John immediately felt his heart break and felt for Alex's hand underneath the comforter.

"I'm alright." Alex snapped quietly.

"Alex, please take my hand." John murmured quietly.

"I said I'm-"

"Alex, please." John's voice was indeed pleading as he rested his hand on Alex's chest to show him exactly where it was.

Alex hesitated a moment before grabbing John's hand.

John immediately tugged Alex forward, holding him up to his own chest before thunder boomed loudly through the room and the sound of rain sloshing around outside got louder, along with Alex's breathing as it became erratic and uneven. John himself began to panic as he tried to think of some way to calm Alex down, to make him feel better, knowing better than to hug him as that may make him feel trapped, especially considering his mind was most likely on the fact and possibility of drowning in the Caribbean Sea the night the hurricane swept through in his previous town in a previous place.

"Alex, I'm here, okay? I'm here, I'm here." John simply repeated this over and over again, but it did little to calm Alex down.

Alex was no longer denying the fact that he wasn't okay as all of his mind and energy was focused on his fears as he began to gasp for breath.

John frantically began to rapidly think of possible solutions before he put his hands on either side of Alex's face, "Alex, Listen, focus on something, something other than what you're thinking about, alright? Find something to focus on, alright?"

"I can't- I can't see th-ouch-" Alex choked out.

"My hand, Alex, focus on my hand."

"You're- hand-" Alex repeated as he lifted a shaky hand of his own to put it on top of John's.

"Good." John whispered, shifting his hand to lower Alex's so their finger's could intertwine and they could hold hands, John then began to rub his thumbs over the back of Alex's hand in a rhythmic way, humming quietly, "Do you like my hand?"

"I like- everything about you John-" Alex breathed out.

John felt his cheeks heat up before he smiled, "And I love everything about you, Hamilton..."

"I- love your freckles, on your hand...and your skin is...really soft, almost as soft as your hair." Alex stated as if these were facts, which they were to him, "And that your frown is so...powerful because you're smiling almost all the time...even when you sleep, you smile, so I wake up to that every morning and it's really quite pleasant..." Alex smiled shyly himself, "And I like that you're always really warm and nice..." Alex commented as John wriggled forward to now press up against Alex's chest, causing Alex to chuckle, "And that you act...like a puppy who needs attention all the time."

"I prefer a turtle who needs attention all the time?" John smiled up at Alex, feeling like the smaller one for once as he snuggled into Alex's chest.

"You're John Laurens, it's all to be expecting." Alex murmured as he pressed his cheek to John's hair, "Yes...really soft hair..."

"Conditioner, try it some time." John teased.

"Oh please." Alex chuckled.

Another boom of the thunder sounded and both the boys held tight to each other, John shoving his face further into the folds of the chest of Alex's hoodie that he was wearing.

"It's alright, John." Alex let out a shaky breath, "You're in my arms...I've got all I need..."