Talking to you was like playing with fire. Daunting and exciting at the same time.
You seemed to be so confident and only the thought of you talking to me made me suddenly so self-conscious.
I asked you if you needed help but you just smiled and said no and damn, your smile could have let worlds collide.
You told the little girl - I later found out that her name was Cassy and that she was six years old and diagnosed with leukaemia - to go back to the common room to find her mommy, then you finally looked up to me.
That moment when you smiled up to me, your eyes peeping trough the strands of hair of your bangs, I knew that I wanted you to carry all my babies. It sounds cheesy, I know but I just couldn't stop myself from thinking things like that.
I told you my name and you said that yours was Aspen. I had never met a girl before named Aspen and I decided that it was a great name. Aspen. Like the tree. I liked that very much.
"Do you work here?" I asked you and you returned a smile.
"Usually, I do. I work part time. The other half of the week I study medicine at King's College in London. But today I'm just here to run some tests." You answered. I had known that you were clever before you said that you studied medicine but it just blew me away. You blew me away.
"What kind of tests?" Yes, I was curious. I wanted to know everything about you. On the other hand, I just wanted to conduct a conversation with you.
"Just some basic blood tests and brain scans." You said. "I'm very forgetful and my mum is worried about it. I'm just a bit out of it sometimes. She's totally exaggerating."
We didn't think much about it at that time. Little did we know that you weren't just forgetful and that you also weren't 'just a bit out of it sometimes' but that a disease was about to ruin your life.
After that we had some smalltalk. Let me tell you, I have never enjoyed smalltalk so much like I did that morning.
You said that you liked our songs and I said that I liked your shirt and you asked me if I would be at the hospital tomorrow and I loved the smile that crept on your face when I told you that I would be coming every single day for the next three weeks.
Unfortunately, that idiot Blake interrupted our conversation, telling me that it was time to get back to the children and that's what I did.
And though I was teaching the children how to play chords on the guitar, I couldn't keep my eyes off you the entire morning and I knew you knew.
