Man in the Woods➵The Soul Keeper "Minhyuk"

Chapter 1 | Past is Past

Readers POV
You walked home. Each day felt crazily long, tiring or made you feel exhausted. You've been working at several places in the past few months, just so you could pay the rent and purchase food. As soon as you arrived at home, you put the keys into the door and unlocked it. 

The lights were still out and everything looked the exact same, as when you left this morning. The door fell into the lock and you ran to your bed to jump in so the wooden planks nearly broke. "Oaaaahhhh" You let out the remaining energy with a scream into your pillow. "I know i can always trust you Sir Pillowingtion" You started to blabber out without actually thinking about it. "Who cares about studying anyways, I'll just leave university and become the greatest actress of Korea and I'm sure nobody is~" Your mouth hung open and your eyes began to water up. "Ever~", your smile fell down slowly and turned into a whiny looking face, "Gonna, stop me. " You're smile was gone, the day wasn't good anymore as your tears fell down on the pillow. "What am I even talking about? No one's gonna ever see me acting in a movie or just a silly commercial! Why should the world need me as another bad actor as if they wouldn't have enough of them already" Your eyes felt like you just fell into a ocean without being able to close them properly, "My parents were always right, and they're still right! They knew it better and they'll do it for the rest of my life!" You screamed at your plushy which on the edge of your mattress. "There's no point in following my dreams, I gotta realize the reality and i must stop fantasizing about dream universes! 

"These sentences, these words I've heard so many times in my live before but i never changed anything about it." Talking it out load, at least to yourself, made you shake your head while realizing that you just couldn't let go all those dreams of yourself.  You're childhood wasn't a happy one, you never had those lovely and trustworthy parents which gave you lots of love and anything you deserved or wanted..

"NO"

You regret being sad about their death. You wanted them to die. You needed them to die. You clearly remember how much you wished it and brightly smiled as they were finally gone for ever. "I always knew they'd leave me one day, even if it felt like an eternity, at least it happened. What even am I? A kid who wished for her parent's death?" 

You suddenly felt all the emotions coming back, loosing all the persons which meant something to your in your unimportant and useless life. 

It all began in elementary school, bullies made fun of your innocent personality and look at what they've done-each and every day you got reminded of how ugly, disturbing, fat and dumb you were. Social media and adverts didn't really made you encourage your way of thinking. Favors,not being filled. Hardship,not being praised and dreams, never coming true. All things you always carried around with you and  which shaped you to what you've become now. "No wonder I had no friends!" All those thoughts made you even more tired but also way too aggressive to think about this in a more humanoid way. No matter how hard you tried to leave it all behind and go on, the words of your past always held you back. It felt like being chained to your past, not able to move on."Never have i been loved, never have i felt empathy nor sympathy." After hours of discussion with yourself, you finally gave up and let go of your thoughts for a bit to glad-fully fell asleep.

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That's it for the first chapter, i promise it will get better, i'm also still not quite sure about leaving it like this but if you want me to already upload what i got, please tell me :)

Byee~