Sitting on a roof. The soft green muscular giant sat there, legs dangling. The only one who wasn't drunk. I had to talk to him. He was beautiful. I had to talk to him.
Info: Gordon Ramsay's Pov. A lot of photoshop images. Good plot-twist. Weird as f...
I started walking upstairs to the roof. I think I saw Guy Fieri making out with Beyonce. It was disturbing, but I had to continue walking. Once I was on the rooftop, I noticed an orange furball in boots waiting for me.
It was Pus'N'Boots.
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''I know you want him.'' He said confidently, with his Spanish accent.
''...What makes you think that?'' I say protecting myself knowing that Pus'N'Boots was one of Shrek's best friend. He looks at me with the No-fucking-shit face.
''Yeah. I do. He's hot.'' I say ashamed. ''What are you gonna do about it?''
He looked down shyly. His face became red. Oh no.
''Don't tell me you're in love with him?!'' He looked disgusted.
''Ew. No never amigo.''He paused. ''I... I like someone else.'' Oh good. I thought he was going to steal my Shrek. Who does he like tho?
''Who? Who is it?'' I ask interested.
''Grizzly.'' He exclaims dramatically, looking into the distance as the wind blows through his whiskers.
WHAT?! Grizzly?! Do you have any idea who Grizzly is? He's a sexe idol! Rumor says he even has abs on his Adam's apples. That's how muscular he is! But... Does that mean the Pus'N'Boots is gay?
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(Yes I legit took a picture of my cat, cut it out, and adjusted it on a body builder. Problem?)
I think that Grizzly was invited to the party too. Donkey likes looking at Grizzly as he sips up some milk. He says that even saw his tongue is flexing as he sips it up.
''Promise you won't tell anyone.'' He says with big wide eyes.
''As long as you don't tell anyone.''
''I guess that's a deal.''
''Well then. I'll just go right ahead and start talking to Shrek.''
''NO WAIT.'' Pus'N'Boots grabs my hand, sinking his claws in accident. I ignored them, I could handle those little claws. ''What are you going to talk about?''
''The weather? I'll figure something out.'' The Pus'N'Boots looked insulted. He slapped me with his claws out. I'm a real man, I can handle the pain as blood drills down into my eye. I think I even lost some eyebrow.
''Shrek isn't easy. If you talk about some random subject, he'll never talk to you ever again. You have to talk about something special... Something only a friend like me knows about him.''
Interesting. This tip could be very useful in flirting with Shrek.
''What is it?''
''Oh. I can't just tell you like that, amigo. You have to earn it.''
''What can I do then?'' He smiled.
''Fix me up a date with Grizzly.''
HERE IT IS.
I'm regretting this, and surely regretting showing this to
school friends. Idk how, but this got up to 30 reads.
Doesn't make sense but wtv.
And yes. I do have a cat named Grizzly.
He's gay. I saw him fuck another cat that looked like a naked version
