Be Mine Tonight - Michael Clifford

Chapter 4 - His Story

MICHAEL

I shoved past Ashton and Luke as I left the game room. Who the hell did that girl think she was. This was my house. Well mine and the rest of the band. But that isn't the point. Just because she is pretty doesnt mean she can just walk into someones house and call them an asshole. Even if I was being kind of a jerk. I just wanted to play some video games. It was bad enough I had to stay in this stupid house in this stupid town.

There was nothing wrong with me. But ever since Kaylie broke up with me two months ago everyone has been treating me differently. We broke up and I stopped going places.The guys really hated when I refused to record or write music. Things really went downhill when my childhood best friend died in a car accident. I lost my girlfriend and my best friend in the same month. I just wanted to be alone, like right now. Yet no one will leave me alone. Our management decided we needed to take some time off when I finally broke down last week.

Luke and Ashton basically forced me to go to a nightclub. I already had a few drinks in me when Kaylie showed up with some tool on her arm.

I shoved through the crowd and ignored the rude comments being made as i went. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS" i shouted as i approached them.

"Michael? What are you doing here?" she asked. Her boyfriend stepped between us.

"Hey man, calm down" he said.

But I couldn't. Between the alochol and the amount of pain I was still under from the breakup I couldnt handle it. I shoved him. "I'm not going to calm down!" I walked up and I got a little too close. "What the fuck does he have that I don't? Or is he paying you to fuck around!"

The guy grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back. "Don't talk to her like that"

I completely lost it and punched him right in the jaw. He threw one back. Right when I threw another punch Kaylie stepped between us. I hit her instead. She fell to the floor and I tried to help but Ashton ran up to us and pulled me away. I kept yelling. "I didn't mean to hit her! Let me help! Kaylie I'm so sorry! Ashton let me go!!" I wanted to make sure she was okay. I really didn't mean for her to get hurt. I didn't want to hurt anyone.

He pulled me to the ally outside of the club. "Let me go back in there Ashton!"

"No Michael! Do you not see what you just did?" he said

"I did! That's why i need to go back and make sure shes okay!" I tried to push him but he wouldn't move. "ASHTON"

"Michael stop! Not letting go of her is killing you! Why can't you see that!" he yelled

"MAYBE THATS WHAT I WANT ASHTON!" I stumbled past him to the front of the club. I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't handle feeling this way. I wanted it all to stop.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I can't fucking do it anymore Ashton! I don't want to do it anymore. Let me self destruct! Let me destroy my life! Jack died, Kaylie left me. I can't deal." I kept walking and Ashton followed. He always followed. He treated me like a child and I hated it.

"Where are you going?" Ashton tried to keep following but I started running. Yes I, Michael Clifford, started running.

I ran until I felt like I was going to puke. When I stopped I was on a bridge. I walked to the side and looked at the icy black water below me. I climbed up to the top ledge of the bridge and stood there. I felt the chill of the wind. I made a list of all the reasons why I should have jumped. I felt empty. I still feel empty. I know I have the rest I the band but there is something missing. I took a breath and was about to take the step off when I saw headlights and three bodies running towards me.