Rammvier Against One

Chapter 8: Recovery

OLIVER'S POV

It had been several weeks since we last saw Till active. I believe it might have been around a month or two ago. Flake still is not doing okay. I saw either saw him stay indoors or go out alone. He refuses, still, to be around anyone. I want to help him, but I'm not one for confrontation. All I can do is hope for the best. As for Paul and Richard, both have been doing their best to keep the group happy and together. Paul visits Till occasionally and plays guitar for him. Not sure what that will accomplish, but I know I'd like it if I was in a coma. Well, I think I'd like it. I'm not too sure what being in a coma is like. I have heard, though, that they can't tell the difference between dreams and reality. Maybe Paul does this to ground Till? I hope it helps. I'd hate for Till to be tortured in his dreams without a means to connect to the real world.

Christoph visits Till too. He feels severely guilty for not making an effort to stop Till. At this point, I believe that this was meant to happen. No matter what we did, Till still ended up at a bar. Now, he is on life support. I miss Till immensely, but all we can do is hope for the best. We had to cancel tours too. Poor people were devastated. Things like these are unpredictable though. None of us really expected Till to be in a coma. Yet, here we are. Where things go.

-

"Hey, Oliver. Richard had the idea of playing the guitar for Till at the hospital. Want to join us?" asked Paul as he reaches for his acoustic guitar. I had nothing else planned for today, and I have not seen Till in a while so I respond with a simple nod. Richard, Paul, and I make our way to the hospital where Till is at. We bring all of our guitars alongside us. We had to wait a little bit because Till was getting some tests. The wait was around 30 minutes which made Richard very anxious.

"You may enter now," states the polite female nurse. Paul goes first. Then, is followed by Richard. I go in last. All of us surround Till's bed and glance at one another. I pull over some chairs from Till's hospital room over to where we are standing. I sit down and start the beat to Seeman. The rest join in as we sing along to the song. Till had this monitor-like thing attached to his finger and head. It could tell what emotion he felt. Halfway through the song, the monitor lets us know Till is pleased. All of us beam with happiness. He is able to hear us at least. We finish off the song and move onto Ohne Dich. When we started the song, the monitor changed almost immediately. We turn to face it, only to see that apparently Till is sad. We debate on whether we should continue or not. I wanted to, but if Till didn't want that song being played, then I'll avoid it for now.

"Let's play something else instead," suggests Paul as he glances at Richard. I did not oppose the idea. The monitor goes off once more. Till is even more sad. Paul and Richard try comforting him and saying things will be okay but the monitor showed that Till was getting worse. We all stop and stay silent.

"Till," I say, "We miss you. Even if we can't interact, I'm still grateful you're here." The other two did not say a word. The monitor shows that Till is conflicted (mix of emotions.) I look at the others and say, "Maybe we should go." Paul became very hesitant when it came to leaving. The screen showed his emotions go back to being sad again. I don't think he wants us to go. I wouldn't put it past him. It must be terrifying not being able to wake up.

"Why not one more song?" suggests Richard. Both Paul and I nod in unison.

"You know what we haven't played in years?" asks Paul.

"A lot of songs but which one do you have in mind?"replies Richard.

"Let's play Feuerräder." All of us had a big smile on our face. Last time this song was performed was around the 90s. All of us still remember the lyrics because this song was a building block for our success later. Even if it wasn't included in Herzeleid.

"Leg mir das Halsband um
dann geh ich auf die Knie
und fang zu bellen an
der Schmerz ist schön wie nie"

I look at Till and he has on his face. I stop playing and point at Till. The other two become astonished at what they are witnessing. All of us continue to play the rest of the song in hopes that Till may do more than just smile. Sadly, nothing else happened but hey that's a start. See you soon, Till.

-

Originally written: April 18, 2018