Chapter 9: Lauft

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FLAKE'S POV

I won't lie. I have been refusing to visit Till lately. I hate seeing him like that. He can't even move! I have to distance myself from him or else I will become depressed. It feels like forever since I last him move! It hurts me to see where he is now-that none of us could have stopped him no matter how hard we tried.

-

"Hey, Flake! Let's go visit Till. I'm not taking no for an answer this time," says Paul as he makes his way towards me.

He gently pats my back and starts getting his things ready. I hate it when he pulls stupid scheiß like this. He should know that I'm still not ready to face Till again-not after what happened. I grab my phone and walk out to Paul's car. It is just going to be him and me. Fantastisch.

-CAR RIDE-

I look out the window and frown.

Wake up, Till.

I find myself feeling discouraged and upset. Paul catches on to my sadness and hopelessness. He keeps his eyes on the road but eventually turns for a bit to say a few words to me.

"Don't worry, Flake. He'll be okay. He smiled at us some time ago," reassures Paul as he turns around to look back at the road. Something about Paul always fascinated me. No matter what situation we were in, he always found something to be hopeful about. Back in the early days of our life in Germany, Paul and I were severely poor. We would find way to make money though. Paul decided to use our curtains to make jackets of some sort. I do not know where he got that idea, but it sure worked in our favor. I smile and reminisce for a bit. Then the pain I initially had returns. I frown and refuse to look in Paul's direction.

"I don't feel like seeing him," I reply with discontent in my voice. A part of me has mixed feelings about seeing Till. Of course I want to see my friend! But...look at the state he's in. I do not want to see him like that. It pains me. Maybe I could have done more?

"Flake, don't be like that. He's your best friend. If you were in a coma, I know Till would visit you everyday." Paul responds in a parental tone.

"That is true, but you have to understand my reasons too. I can't help but feel a bit betrayed. He acts like he doesn't care about how we feel," I say with disdain. The car is filled with silence for a bit before Paul responds.

"I understand, Flake, but Till isn't all that bright. He hurts us because he doesn't know any better," comforts Paul. The harsh reality of Till's actions sting, but Paul is not wrong about him.

"Ich weiß Paul! Ich weiß..." I reply somewhat frustrated at how illogical Till can be. It hurts, but what can we do?

Paul did not say anything to me after that awkward conversation. He is concerned about my wellbeing however. I return to looking out the window once more. I see we're almost there.

-IN THE HOSPITAL-

Paul pulls me out of the car because I tried refusing. He was not having it. I am not sure why he wants me to see Till this badly. I did not fight him though. There's no stopping Paul.

"We'd like to visit room A-19," requests Paul.

"Sure, hold on," replies the lady as she reaches for the outdated phone. I look over at Paul and he has a serious look. I wonder why he's so serious.

What is he planning?

"The man in that room's name is Till, right?" asks the woman.

"Yes," Paul and I reply in unison.

"The room is vacant. The last person there, apparently around 6 a.m., checked himself out of this hospital. Sorry I cannot be of much help," states the woman plainly. Paul and I both turn to face each other in shock.

He's...gone?!

Paul thanks the lady and suggests we go.  We both make our way back to the car.

A question that lingers is where is Till?

He just disappeared! Both Paul and I step into the car and take a moment to think. I turn to face Paul, only to see him staring blankly at nothing in particular. I couldn't even look at him anymore. Both of us stay quiet for what seemed like an eternity.

"What now?" hopelessly asks Paul. I do not know how to respond to this. Where could he have gone?

"Paul, where do you think he could be?" I weakly ask. At this point no one knows where he could be. This man is very unpredictable.

"Let's try calling home, " suggests a now desperate Paul. I nod my head and reach for my phone. It rings several times before anyone picks up.

"Ja?" answers an exhausted Oliver.

"This might be a weird question, but is Till there?" I question with a hint of hope in my voice.

Oliver remains silent before responding with, "No?" I ask again. He hesitates once more.

"Is this a joke? I'm not good with jokes, Flake. You should know," plainly says Oliver.

"Ollie, this is not a joke. Till is...well he's not in the hospital anymore. Paul and I are coming up with ideas as to where he could be," I respond as I glance over at Paul. Paul seems to be very worried. I am too. A sigh could be heard from the other line.

"Well, that explains the question. No, he is not here. Check with Christoph. Maybe he went over to his house?" suggests the bassist.

"Thanks, Oliver. I'll check with Doom right now. Auf Weiderhören!" I state before hanging up. Paul gives me a look full of hopelessness. I try to comfort him but he seems far too sad at the moment. I let it be and begin to call Christoph.

-

Originally written: April 20, 2018

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