I&P ♔ bowers gang [1]

IMAGINE ♔ henry bowers

SONG: dark enough by amanda lopoccolo
WORDCOUNT: 763
REQUESTED BY: d-delicate
A/N: short, but i like how it turned out
also sorry for the wait

•   .   •   .   •   .   •   .   •

❝ There is a girl, in the front of my class
Who I swear I've never seen do anything but laugh
She's tall and she's smart, beautiful and strong
and when someone's down, she tries to fix what is wrong ❞

Henry's eyes glanced toward your seat in the front from the back, and he could practically hear how fast his heart began to beat that same way it always did when he saw you. He could imagine that smile that seemed to always be on your face, lighting up the room and enhancing all of your other features; just making you look even more beautiful to him.

Your smile was the only one Henry ever wanted to see on a person, the only smile he looked forward to seeing everyday. You were the only person he looked forward to seeing everyday at school.

❝ How does someone so perfect, feel so insecure?
As to scar her skin with cuts and burns, and still want to hurt more
How does someone so loving, learn to hate her own guts?
Drawing a picture on her arms with a blade,
as if her mind isn't dark enough ❞

Henry's mind traveled to the thought of your scarred arms with cuts littering them that you used to hide under your long sleeved shirts and hoodies. How did he not realize what they were before? Henry remembered the time that he first caught a glimpse of a faded white cut across your forearm after your long sleeve had accidentally been pulled up by your backpack strap. He always used to think that they were just scars from some accident you had been in when you were little or something.

Henry's mind didn't wonder over to the dark thought of what they could've been, because why would a such happy and pretty girl like you ever do something like that? He knows pretty much all of your friends and knows that they would do anything for you so you weren't lonely, and he was pretty sure you didn't have the same home life like he has, so why would you want to hurt yourself?

Henry realized, maybe he didn't know you as well as he believed he did from his far away observations.

❝ There is a girl, in the front of my class
Who's eyes are glazed over, like newly cut glass
The ghost of a smile, hints at her face
and she laughs as they tell her "who's on first base" ❞

The one thing Henry really hated himself for is the fact that he didn't notice that the happy front that you put on was just that. A front. That the laughs and smiles you put out were all fake and you used them to hide the fact that underneath, you were hurting. How could have he claimed to himself that he was in love with you, but not even notice that you weren't truly happy?

❝ There is a girl, in the front of my class
Who yesterday took the breath that was her last ❞

Henry blinked his eyes at your empty desk, nothing but a ghost of you now sat there soon to be replaced by another student next period. Or maybe they wouldn't sit there, "in honor" of it having been your seat.

Henry wasn't one for crying at all, but he had to bite his lip in order to choke back a sob and look up so the tears that threatened to spill out of his eyes didn't fall. He silently prayed no one noticed this, he had a reputation to uphold and didn't need anyone seeing he had a soft spot; especially for you.

Part of Henry blamed himself for your death. He was mad at himself, because he thought that maybe if he would've actually grown a pair and talked to you this could've all been avoided. If he just would have told you how he felt about you, and then you'd realized that someone loves you and then you wouldn't have killed yourself because you had something to live for; him.

Then Henry's dark side of his mind came out and he thought to himself that maybe it wouldn't have changed anything. Maybe it would've made matters absolutely worse. You probably despised him just like everyone else, and the thought of him liking you would've just made you barf and want to end your life more.

Henry would never know the answer for sure now, because you were gone and not coming back.