Endless Love.....

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I do not own any rights to TVD characters these belong to L.J Smith T.V show. The only charters who belong to me is Siena Russo, Tony Russo, Chrizina Russo, Julian Gracia, Nico Gracia/Salvatore Happy reading :D

Siena P.O.V

From the moment I woke up in that hospital bed I didn't know what to think. To be told that somehow I had come back from the dead. Then hearing that Damon didn't. That he was dead that there was nothing I could do about it. Hearing those words my heart ached that I can't even explain in words. To have the one you love ripped away from you in such a way. All I wanted to do was kill someone and I wanted to die and I wanted to run as far and as fast as I could because he was never coming back. Damon had fallen off the face of the earth and he was never coming back. As the moment hit me I was hit with another. The fact I was with child that was something that I truly never expect. To have this tiny creation grow inside me that was made out of love. The love that Damon and I had for one another. How can a moment of pure happiness be turned into a moment of sadness. The sadness was because this child will never know his/her father. He was a man who wasn't perfect he did reckless things but beneath all that he was a good man. That was proven on how far he went to bring me and Stefan back from the other side. A selfless act that no one would have thought Damon Salvatore would do. But this was the man who I always knew he was and could be. The sad part it took his death for everyone to see that.

When I went to my parents place it didn't feel right I didn't feel like myself. I knew why that was because a part of life had died and I just couldn't see how I was going to continue to live. My mom and Elena would ask me questions of what I remember of that night. The only thing I could remember was holding Damon hand along with Bonnie and a bright light consuming us. To be told I was found in the amazon how I got there I couldn't explain any of it. They both tried not to push me but I knew I couldn't stay in New York not after everything that happened here also. Now with my parents knowing what I am I notice they treated me differently. Not so much my mom but my dad was a little distant with me. I guess he doesn't see me as his innocent little girl anymore. A part of me expected that if I'm being totally honest and it hurt that my dad didn't look at me in the same way.

This was my life now I wasn't living anymore lies. I had to somehow look forward to be focus with the fact I was going to be a mom again. My first time round didn't work out too well with Nico. How he was snatched from me. How I missed out on so much with him. For my baby boy to have some horrible curse put on him that brought this Nickar to the surface. It was all my fault. It was all because of who I am. All this everything that had happened was my fault. Damon and Bonnie death was all on me. Nothing and no one could tell me any different. I didn't share these thoughts with anyone because I knew what I would be told. So what feelings I was feeling I kept bottle up. I just felt numb like all this was some kind of terrible nightmare. That any moment I would wake up in the boarding house in a cold sweat and turn to my left and see Damon beside me. That what I hoped and prayed for. So my motto was that I was going to endure this until I was awaken and my life wouldn't be this emptiness it would be filled with laughter and love. That was the only thing keeping me going right now.

With it being awkward for me being in New York I decided to go back to Mystic Falls. Well I was told we couldn't actually go back due to what Nickar had done. I couldn't even go back to my home and be in the comfort surrounding of the memories I share with Damon. That was a hard thing for me to deal with but somehow I managed it. Elena and Stefan had a cottage which they somehow acquired when I arrived I was shown to my room. They both really did make an effort to make it homely for me they even had some of my things from the boarding house brought over. The first thing that caught my eye was a picture frame of the day that Damon and I got married. See that brought a string of emotions to me. Sadness would always come first because of then lose then would come joy because I had the honour of knowing such a man. To of had those couple of years with him in my life it was a blessing but then when the anger would kick in. I would be filled with resentment towards myself and asking questions with 'why?'

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