Songs About Hayley (A Hayley Williams FanFiction)

This Love

I decided to edit this one as I wasn't happy with the OVERLY SEXUAL nature of it so...

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I wake up to the sound of the door being closed, it's Cynthia, no surprise. She sees me looking at her entering while lying on the couch. She looks at me with this devilish look. She's drunk, and when she's drunk, she's horny.

"Hey there, handsome." She says as she approaches me on the couch. I guess this is one way to wake up. 

She starts to make out with me and eventually the kiss deepens. We decide to move things to the bedroom, knocking pictures off of walls on the way there.

That's one thing that movies never get right is sex, it's a very clumsy thing, I couldn't even tell you how the bedside lamp still works, the amount of times that thing has been knocked over, must be in the hundreds. The way things were getting, it reminds me of how we used to be whilst madly in love, just sex, sex and more sex. As we undressed each other, I noticed she didn't have any underwear on, I just saw it as one less clothing item to remove before we get to the good stuff. Eventually, the deed is done, as they would say.

As we're lying there naked, next to each other, something weird dawns on me. Why did she already have no underwear on? Did she take it off before getting in so she could start right away? Seems a bit strange since she was wearing a fairly short skirt. Eventually, I fall asleep next to the already sleeping Cynthia.

The next morning, I wake up alone, first time that's happened in a while. I get decently dressed in sweatpants and an undershirt and go to the kitchen to find where Cynthia had gone. I found her there in nothing but a dressing gown, making breakfast, toast, again. I decided I'd quiz her on her lack of underwear last night. As a boyfriend, I wouldn't want her at a club or on the street with nothing protecting her private area under her short skirt.

"Hey, uh, why weren't you wearing underwear when you came in last night?" 

"Huh?" She looks at me while holding her forehead, a hangover, of course. I repeated myself, louder this time, just to rub in her hangover. That's why I rarely get wasted.

"Oh, um, I, uh..." she looked panicked and got all flustered after she heard the question, perhaps I embarrassed her? There's no one else here, so... "I just wanted to, y'know, surprise you?" she seemed to be asking me if that was the right thing to say, which was weird. I shrugged it off as her being delusional from the hangover and partying, etc.

"Well, I've gotta go to class, I'll see you in a few hours, love." I said as I went into the bedroom to get dressed for real this time, in jeans and a striped t-shirt. As I was leaving, she was standing at the front door.

"Hey, uh, I love you" she says, almost nervously, it's not like she was saying it for the first time, the first time in a while, sure but I still thought there was something fishy going.

"I love you too" I say as I give her a peck on the lips and leave. 

Music is what I was studying in Nashville, I adore music. I'm a big fan of lots of bands, The Beatles were a big favourite, of course. We looked at chord progressions and all that jazz, also literally talked about jazz for a while, brass instruments, the less known ones. 

It's about 12:00pm and I don't have to be at another class until 2 so I decided to pop home for lunch. I come in and hang up my jacket but I stop. I don't own a leather jacket, do I? But there's one hung up on the coat rack. That thought enters my head, you know the one. I look around the sitting room, nothing out of the ordinary. If she's actually cheating, she's trying to go around it smartly, apart from the idiot who hung up his coat, I never would have suspected anything. 

I pick up a newspaper and glanced at the front page. "Terrorist attack on Glasgow airport". Thankfully, my family's all in Edinburgh so they wouldn't have been affected by what I imagine as the first terrorist attack in Scotland. I throw the paper back down and stop instantly as I hear something, a mouse? I wouldn't be surprised, no, it's a consistent squeak. It's coming from the bedroom. And there are the grunts and moans, also consistent. I knew what was going to happen, I would open the door, see a man fucking my girlfriend and would either violently murder the man or sob and moan until they started to comfort me and apologise. I decided to do neither, I wrote Cynthia a note and left it on the kitchen counter, like she did the other day.

Do you feel satisfied? I hope that dude's more sufficient than I am as a lover. Fuck you.

No, wait. You can be more poised than that, Paul. I start to scribble it out until a tear hits the paper. Was that me? Am I seriously crying over this? I was, I didn't realise it until I wrote it down and processed it more. I decided to throw the note across the other side of the room in a scrunched up ball and left, making sure to slam the door loud enough for them to know I had been there. 

I got in my car and turned it on, I had been listening to Sgt. Pepper's by The Beatles and A Day In The Life was on. 

I read the news today, oh boy. 

About a lucky man who made the grade.

Aren't those lines ironic. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw my terrible ugly cry face, hadn't seen that one in a while. 

He blew his mind out in a car.

You know, that doesn't sound like a bad idea. If I'm not a sufficient enough lover then I guess, I've no future, not like I'm gonna be a huge musician one day, I'm running away from one problem but the other 1000 problems are still hot on my tail. I could make them all go away. 

The lake is nearby, I could just roll down the windows and go headfirst with the car right in there. Without thinking, I start to drive. I'm almost there and realise what I'm doing on my way there but still not stopping. I'm literally bawling my eyes out at this point. Is this what heartbreak feels like? I'm nearing the lake, am I really going through with this? 

You've gotta roll with it, you've got to take your time.

Damn it, that's my cell phone ringing. I answer it while driving, pretty ballsy.

"Hey, Paulie" I hear a chirpy George say.

"George, I'm driving into the lake, I'm gonna kill myself right now." I blubber out through tears.

"Woah woah woah, what's going on buddy?" George immediately becomes concerned at my sudden and unexpected outburst of suicide. "Rethink what you're doing here, is it worth it?"

He was right, I don't know who I was kidding. Eventually I park my car next to the lake. 

"Just come and stay at mine for a while, okay buddy? Promise me you won't do anything stupid."

"I won't, George."

I made my way to George's apartment block, a lot nicer than mine, more cleaner at least. I find his door, 8B, and knock. He answers and immediately pulls me into a hug. I guess you could say we were brothers. He even came over to Nashville with me, I guess as support, he goes to a different college to me, studying archaeology. He insists on meeting up at least once a week for  a chat, which is appreciated. 

I explain the whole situation to him after we've sat down in his living room on the couch. He feels nothing but sympathy for me, he wouldn't understand, of course, he's never really been in a relationship in his life so far. But, at least, he's considerate, that's more than I could ask for right now. 

"Don't worry, I've got a spare room so you don't have to worry about sleeping on the couch, sleeping in the same bed as me or being a burden."

"Thanks a lot, George. I think I'm gonna have a lie down for a while" I told him. He simply nodded his head understanding. I went through and almost passed out after the emotional roller-coaster I had went on these past couple hours. This is not how I imagined this day going when I woke up this morning.