My Name Is Memory

1 5 . 1 2 . 2 0 1 5

“A dream has the power to poison sleep.”

•°•°•°•°•

To the one from the star,

The poem was from an anonymous person.

I didn't know whether to be be happy about the fact that someone was sending me messages, or to be wary that they knew I probably loved Keats’ poetry the best -- Bright Star being one of my favourites.

What if this person knew more about me? My likes and dislikes? My joys and sorrows? Just the idea of it gave me the feeling of hanging from the edge of the cliff; legs dangling, hands screaming with pain while I grasped onto grass and dirt to save myself from falling. The winds beating against my face took the breath out of my lungs. My skin crawled underneath, while the serpent of fear uncoiled in my stomach.

I hated this feeling. I hated that someone had noticed me. I don't think I would've minded much if it were you. But it wasn't you. You knew a lot about me, but didn't know the small things either. Like my favourite kind of music; my favourite poet; my favourite novel.

There was a lot you didn't know.

It wasn't only our likes and dislikes that made us though. There were these feelings and emotions, too, that built us. And you understood those emotions, making and breaking my heart, better than anyone else.

Sometimes I wondered if you knew that I loved you. I hadn't ever voiced it out loud, so I always assumed you didn't. But the ease with which you could read my eyes; peek through the cracks of my broken soul; steal the words out of my lips as if it were your own thoughts -- I often think it's impossible for you not to have noticed.

That night, sitting on the roof of my house, I watched a star fall. I wondered who would be fortunate enough to meet a celestial being like you this time.

It is overwhelming, really, when you think about it. A star falling from the sky appears at your doorstep to fulfill all your wishes. Not just one. Not just two. But all of them, until you're satisfied.

Isn't that a little good to be true?

Exactly what I thought. I wish I knew that sooner.

Nothing good lasts longer than a few heartbeats. The next moment when you find your heart racing, you get ahead of yourself and realise that you've already left your chance far behind.

I got ahead of myself: a mistake I never thought I would make.

The jewelled sky that spread above me shone with the glow of a thousand stars. The moon was lost under the shimmer of faraway galaxies. But it's fluorescence caught the falling snow, lighting the flakes up so bright they almost looked like a rain of stars.

The snow had kept me enchanted for a good while, until you climbed up to the roof and took your seat beside me.

“Do you ever feel lonely up there? In the sky?” I'd whispered, and I almost thought my voice was lost in the breeze.

I don't think I'd ever asked you about you before. What was it like to fly through the clouds? What was it like to shine with a brightness equally scintillating like that of the sun? What was it like when you'd stepped on Earth for the first time? When was your first time?

There were too many questions, but I don't think I wanted to know the answer to all of them.

“Well….I don't know. It was different up there in the sky. I have friends, but we don't get to sit down and have a nice chit chat like humans do.”

“Then what to you do? If you don't chit chat?”

You'd smirked, and I knew it would be either something fun or equally dangerous. “We race.”

“I don't even want to know about your races. You probably slip and fall down from the sky when you cross the speed limit.”

“We're not cars. We're stars. We're 80% gas and 20% glitter. We're fast.”

“And shiny.”

“At least I'm not a genie. His hat is weird.”

“Who asked you try those anyway? Where did you find it in the first place?”

You'd smirked again, and I knew I didn't want to know the answer to that either.

•°•°•°•°•

A/N

This isn't much but things will be rolling again soon! 😉 Nonetheless, I hope you enjoyed. Let me know your thoughts.

Thank you so much for reading! ❤

~Jenna