EMOTIONAL .//. S.M.

1

Shawn***

It's been years since I thought of her. The way her hair smelled the way she smiled the way she laughed at the jokes that weren't even funny. She was super supportive and I should've been supportive of her. I should've accepted that she wanted some space and not force things to happen I shouldn't have let another girl in between us. Now that girl is behind bars and the love of my life is gone.

I am on tour and a lot of my friends are here because I am in the place where everything started, Los Angeles, California. The place where I met ashley for the first time. It's the place where I fell in love. As I walk out on I can see the signs out in the audience from my friends who thought it was funny to write nasty things on them. There was Taylor, kimmie, bea, Nash, jack, jack, Matt, and Cameron. I missed them all to be honest. After everything that happened we became closer. After my hallucinations and trying to kill myself I still have my friends by my side.

I start the set off with bring it back thinking about ashley during this son makes me tear up. After the song I take the time to talk about my life.

"This is my first tour in about three years. Since I stopped my last tour to take sometime for my mental health, I have become stronger and stronger. I went through a hard time losing the love of my life to an unfortunate illness called depression. I struggle with it too and nearly lost my own life, but since then I've gotten stronger. I want everyone to know that you don't have to take your own life there are ways to get help and things do truely get better. This next song is a song I've been working on it's not released yet but it's been something that has been very hard for me to sing and I don't know if I'm going to release it at all, but the love of my life had written this song before she passed and it's called like to be you. I hope you enjoy."

I hear the crowd go wild as they hear me start strumming the new song. It doesn't even feel like I'm strumming the guitar, I feel as if I'm watching ashley from across the room again. I sing my heart out for ashley. I know she isn't here to see me sing but all my friends who have supported me are tonight.

When I finish the song I take a sip of my water and pick up a towel to wipe the tears. "Tonight is going to be a very emotional night for me. This is the city I met a beautiful young messed up girl. I fell in love. Our relationship with beautiful and toxic. I never realised that until it was too late. It's been years since I have thought about her death, because every time I did it would make me very depressed," I take a sip of water, "these next few songs are going to be off my the last two albums I put out. I know this isn't the set list you guys have been hearing about but this is a special day in a special town so I want to tribute the night to ashley. Sing if you know them."

I strum the guitar as my band starts to play behind me. If only she could see me now.

.....

IM BAAAAAAACK

who missed me?!

What's up with shawn? Is he really better? Is ashley still really gone??

"Let's get lost tonight!"
Guess the song !

AS ALWAYS MUCH LOVE AND MUFFINS
~KIMBERLY