27. Realisation

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I was listening to this song the entire time i was writing this chapter
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"Ok now get off of me you guys have been huggging me for the last five minutes." I said as i felt tears in my eyes form again.

"WE WON'T EVER FORGET YOU SUNNI!" The five of them screamed but it sounded more like crying.

"Ok ok i know now let go. I'm hungry and i wanna start a movie."

As soon as they let go i rushed to the kitchen to let the tears fall down. It was just a couple which was good because i heard them walking in.

"So whats for dinner."

"Taemin how can you ask that now when we were all crying."

"What i want food dont act like you dont want any too you were the only one who didnt have ice cream."

"Minho can put away hunger if someones feelings are more important. Now move youre blocking the fridge." I said as i grabbed his nose a little.

"Ow that hurt."

"Stop acting like a baby so me and and Sunni can cook in pea-"

"Actually key I wanna cook alone today. You guys can go catch up with Jong I'll be in here. But before you guys leave what do you want for dinner?" I asked as I cut key off.

"Anything would be fine if you're cooking it. Its been so long since i had your cooking, i craved it every day im America." Jong said putting a smile on my face.

"Ok then I'll make something quick. Go, leave." I pushed them out of the kitchen while laughing to hide the tears.

I got out some ingredients to make a type of pasta we always had when we were together.

As I was making it tears fell from my eyes. I don't even know why but they just fell. We're all together now and I can't wish for anything more but, i know one day we won't be and I'm not ready to face that again.

............

"We're just gonna let her cry in the kitchen?"

"Taemin I know it's hard for you to accept but she needs to be alone right now. Trust me, I'm her brother i know. Give her a few minutes alone and she'll be fine." I looked towards the kitchen hoping she really will be fine.

She went through a lot and she knows she's going to have to go through it again and it rips my heart apart that I can"t be in there to help her get through it together.

"Go."

"Huh?"

"Go, she needs you right now and it's ok, we don't mind."

"Thanks, Minho."

I got up and went in the kitchen.

"I-i thought i told you guys no-not to come in." She managed to make out through her sobs.

How can such a small girl like her handle all this by herself, she can come to us when she feels like this.

"It's ok, it's ok. Cry, cry all you want. It's ok to let your emotions out, you don't always have to act strong in front of us. You can cry and be weak in front of us too. We know you're a powerful girl but being a little weak sometimes is ok." I stroked her back as she broke out into sobs. I made the hug tighter and let her cry.

I'm sorry,  I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me for so long. But I promise, I'm here now and I will always stay by your side. I'm so sorry Sunni.

Before i knew it tears fell out of my eyes too. It's sort of ironic actually, i came here to help her stop crying a little and i started crying myself. I let out a little chuckle at the thought.

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