Strings In My Veins ( Puppeteer x Reader )

Chapter fourteen

11.2.18// Realm between life and death

It's been a week since I've died, and the sudden realization along with chronic depression hasn't hit yet. I don't breathe, blink, and even at certain times...feel anymore.
I haven't gone back to that corridor of horrors. How can I?

"I can't be in here anymore," I say, breaking the silence between the three of us. Emra looked up at me, shocked. Zachary said nothing.

"What are you doing? You have to stay here," Emra warned me. She grabbed ahold of my wrist as I quickly shook her off.

"Why, because he told you to? I'm dead, what's left to lose now?" I snapped. I opened the door and stormed out. I passed by a nearly broken, wooden door and stopped when I heard muffled screams. My hand twitched as I cracked the door open to find Finn tied up with golden strings to a chair in the middle of the room. Seeing him brought back memories...some good, some not so good.

"F-Finn?" I managed to croak out. He turned his head towards me and I flinched back at his face of distress and sadness. He then hung his head down.

"Leave," he managed to say, "please."
Out of nowhere, the golden strings glowed and it seemed like it was burning him as it tightened around him.
I went to go untie him, which is probably the dumbest thing I've ever done, but he shook his head. I'm glad that he's avoiding eye contact with me...every time I stare into those eyes it reminds me of that night. His blue strands of hair laid perfectly across his face.

"Finn...did he do this to you?" I say, looking down. Finn said nothing.

"No. I did this to myself," he says after a while. I shook my head.

"Look at me, Finn," I demanded. Once again, he stayed silent.

"Auggie Finn Jackson, you fucking look at me. It's the least you can do since you...well since you—you...y-you," I stammered. He scoffed and looked at me, tears streaming down his face.

"Say it. Raped. I raped you," he says, "and I will suffer for all eternity for what I did to the girl that I loved."
The golden strings tightened around him as he cried out in pain. My dead heart clenched together, making me hold my chest. Memories flooded my head, quickly, causing a massive migraine.

"Why'd you do it?" I say, my voice quivering and barely over a whisper. He shook his head and held in his sobs.

"Why did I do it? I...well, just so you know this isn't an excuse but it started when you were in my dorm room and we watching some movie. I wasn't watching it but I was staring at you, I craved you. You're perfect. The way you but your lip and your laugh, I just...I wanted you. I thought a kiss would be weird and my mind was flooding with possibilities of rejection, my fear. So I went down on you before I could get rejected...and there was this evil inside of me. Some kind of fucked up lust for you...it hurt you, traumatized you. I'm deeply sorry for what I did so please leave this room and never come back," Finn pleaded.
I approached him and slapped him across the face.

"I can never think of you the same again, Finn. I do still love you and as hard as this is...I forgive you," I say.
I untied him and he immediately fell to the ground. There were possibly third-degree burns across his body. I held him close to me, trying not to cry. Not because of the burns but being close to my rapist. I do forgive him though, and nobody will ever understand why. I forgave him for myself. I forgave him so I wouldn't be blaming myself for the rest of my eternal "life".

"You forgive the monster that assaulted you?" A voice emerged from behind me. I turned around and avoided eye contact with Jonathan.

"Yes, but I don't forgive the monster that fucked up my mental state and murdered me, Issac, Finn, and countless other people," I snapped. Jonathan glared at Finn and dragged me out of the room and locked it.

"As your master, my order to you is stay away from him. You break my rules and you face punishment," Jonathan says, throwing me back into the room with the others.

"I hate you, Jonathan, I really do. Nobody can be as unloveable and shitty as you," I spat. He slammed the door without another word.